Funny how moving isn't just about a new home

So what do you do when you feel the desire for more God? I'm kinda there right now. I've seen and experienced God more in the past year or so than I ever imagined, but now I find myself wanting even more.

The lovely Miss Sarah visited me tonight to help out with my packing. Honestly, she's my favorite person on the planet, even though she laughed herself into suffocation because of my childhood pictures. Amazingly, my junk room is now cleaned out and ready to pack, a feat that I could not have accomplished alone considering I fell off a pole today. More on that in a minute. I exponentially thank you, Sarah. And your hair looks fantastic.

Sarah and I were talking and I was saying how I feel kind of stalled out right now. I usually feel discouraged by this but the more I talked about it and the more I think about it now, I think it's a good thing. I can't help but look back at the growth of this year, for me and the whole student group, and be thankful to God for loving me enough to continue to deepen our relationship, but also for allowing me to be part of the work He's doing at SCBC. But we can't stay there, right? We have to be moving. We have to take steps forward.

So I'm grateful for this desire to progress. It is frustrating at first to want to move forward without knowing the steps to take, but that will come. As we talked about earlier, staying focused on Him and committed to following Him is the key to progress.

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Yeah, so I got careless today. I was ascending a pole when I cut out and descended rather rapidly. That's twice in ten years. I've been lucky both times.

The first rule of pole-climbing is to push off when you fall. You NEVER hug the pole because you will burn all the skin off your arms and chest. Well guess what? I have raw meat exposed on my right arm and chest. If anyone wants my DNA sample, there's a streak of skin about twenty feet long on a pole in Holston Hills. And I landed with my knees locked, another faux pas. I think I'm an inch shorter tonight.

Let that be a lesson to all of you. Get plenty of rest or you'll burn the hide off your arms.

Update...(because I'm too tired to be creative)

For those of you who have been on the edge of your seat waiting to hear how my house sale and move are going, here's the latest. Somehow I get the feeling that most of you just hit your back button. Oh well.

This is hell week. Even with all the late nights and preparation for the impending move, I am still behind. It seems that the more I try to get ahead, the farther away the finish line moves. Here's an example:

Saturday was supposed to be a packing day. Instead, I spent the day with Ryan building a deck on the back of the house. FHA required some sort of landing off the back door, even though the insurance company was satisfied with a padlock. So we set forth to construct a small 4' x 4' balcony just to appease the gubment. Well, the buyers, who originally agreed to take the house pretty much "as is", decided they would like a more usuable space. So the small balcony turned into a full-blown deck, 8' x 8', which doubled the price of materials and the labor. Did I mention it was 375 degrees on Saturday? I guess I might as well remodel the whole dang house for them.

Don't poke the bear.

Moving on. Tonight, I left work and went to buy a refrigerator, delivered and installed the fridge, blew off a haircut appointment because of time constraints, finished the last piece of the immaculate deck, and retired inside to do some more packing. The good news is that I only have one room left to pack. The bad news is it is the back junk room. Aptly named.

Don't poke the bear.

In the midst of all of this physical exertion, I have the overwhelming task of transferring all utilities, getting renter's insurance, signing papers in advance because the closing date falls during our Romania trip, and trying to schedule myself to be available at the new place for installs and such. I have now arrived at the fabled place called Wit's End.

But today I realized something. I shared this with Juli and Ryan, who I think agreed. I now know what the Bible means when it speaks of a help meet. I think the original Hebrew translates, "it is not good for man to be alone because moving is too involved and time-consuming, so I will make him a help meet for him." People don't marry because of love, it's because no one is capable of doing crap like this alone. It takes two because there's too much to do.

Of course I'm joking! But I do think a rent-a-spouse business would really go for those in similar predicaments.

Please pray for my dwindling sanity.

And welcome to Jessie Mikles, who I just noticed as a new follower. Jessie, I promise not all my posts are this whiney and hateful. That doesn't mean they are good, though.

Happy Tuesday, y'all.

"I'm not the King, I just sing"

I apologize in advance for this because we will all hear enough about this without having to read my blog. But watching the news tonight has stirred me up.

Farrah Fawcett passed away. A " '70's Icon," according to the news networks. I remember her on Charlie's Angels when I was little. And the poster of her in the red one-piece swimsuit with her head tilted back and the wavy hair is said to be one of the most popular photographs of all time. For those of you too young to know, she really was a superstar back then, comparable to Britney or Beyonce now, I guess. But now she is dead.

And Michael Jackson, dead at 50. Every channel on television has this running on their little ticker at the bottom. They are touting his accomplishments, mourning the great loss of talent, and praising this greatest of entertainers, the so-called "King of Pop." He won 13 Grammys, sold over 750 million albums, including "Thriller," the best selling album of all-time. I still have a copy that I bought the week it was released in 1982. But now he is dead.

The media, the same media who dubbed him, "Wacko Jacko," dragged him through the mud over child-molestation allegations, and always picked apart his eccentricities and facial re-constructions, are now exalting him through watery eyes and downcast expressions.

Now let me get to the part that really gripes me. I am reminded of a song from maybe twenty years ago that is not really much of a song, but it has a great message. It was sung by some famous country singer, I think.

He was born in Massachusetts, in 1917

The second son of an Irishman, we all loved Kennedy.

He was brave and strong and handsome, a helluva president

But when he died, millions cried like he was heaven-sent.

Who did they think he was?

A child was born in Tupelo, in 1935

I'm grateful for his music, it forever changed my life.

We all love "Love Me Tender," and how that boy could sing

But when he died, I wondered why millions called him king.

Tell me, who did they think he was?

There was a child of heaven, born in Bethlehem

just a simple carpenter with worn and calloused hands.

He healed the hearts of many, so they nailed him to a tree

With no one there to mourn his death but the women at his feet, crying

"Who did they think He was, tell me, who did they think He was?"

There was no one there to grieve but the women at his feet, crying, "Who did they think He was?"

I was five years old when Elvis died. The reaction was similar to this only much, much bigger. He died at the top, and very suddenly. I guess I've just never understood the glorifying of a celebrity. To me they are just people whose name we all know. MJ did some cool stuff, especially the "Thriller" video, but I almost puked when I heard Celine Dion say, "When we are talking about the death of a great talent like this, it is much more tragic and harder to accept."

No it isn't.

I'm definitely not trying to downplay the death of anyone. I am very sorry for Papa Joe, Janet, LaToya, Jermaine, Tito, Marlon, Randy, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen, and whoever else is affected by this. But MJ was just a man. Those Grammys aren't doing him any good now.

I think Michael Jackson is a good representation of what we call "the world." Follow me, here. He started out young and quickly grew to be successful. In his older years, he achieved a whole new level of success and stardom, but look what it did to him. The weirdness, the criminal allegations, the constant changing to try and become something else. He may have found notoriety and wealth, which he squandered, but he lost himself and everything he gave to achieve his place.

Success is a mirage. It demands that you give everything to attain it, and the closer you come to where it is, the farther away it gets, finally vanishing and leaving nothing, but taking everything.

Maybe I'm just old and grizzled, but I get sick and tired of a world that edifies a complete whack-job who sings pretty, but persecutes and slanders the Savior of all mankind. It's not difficult to see why the morality of our nation is non-existent. Mourners will cry their eyes out and faint and swoon from grief over the next few weeks, grief for someone they never knew, and who never did anything worthwhile, except organize "We Are the World."

They cared about his latest releases, his concerts and tours, clearing his name after the trials, and pretty much any public thing he said or did. They cared about worshipping him.

But do any of them care that he's probably in Hell right now?

This is the first thing I thought of when I heard Geraldo proclaim the king dead. And it's a good teaser for tonight.

Dang. Best segue ever.

Home hasn't been where my heart is, or was. Or whatever.

This is what happens when a part-time stay-at-home mom has too much time on her hands. Juli decided to bake a cake while feeling a little adventurous, and the result is a chocolate cake with blue icing. It reads, "Eat Me. Mmmm." I can picture her laughing and snorting all alone in the kitchen.

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I would like to thank Virginia, Ryan, and Juli for coming over tonight to hang out and help me with my new favorite sport -- extreme packing. Others of you have volunteered and don't worry, I'll be more than happy to give you an opportunity in the coming week.

But there is a thought that I had tonight that concerns me. While waiting for those three to arrive, I happened to think about the people who have crossed my doorstep since I have lived here. Specifically, my close friends and family at Stock Creek.

It's sad. I have been at Stock Creek for almost six years. I have friends now that are closer and more special to me than any I have ever known. But I haven't really been a hospitable kind of guy.

Heather, Ryan and Juli have been here the most, too many times to count. Sarah and Spenser have been here five or six times. Virginia, once, counting tonight. And Jason and Valerie stopped by for a quick minute about a year ago. That's it as far as our crew goes. Occasional drop-ins like Bernie and Teri and the Snapps, and Ed Frahme who visited me and brought my gift basket after my first visit to the church. I would dare say that most of you don't even know where this place is and that is my fault. It's not that I don't want people around, I just haven't been much of an entertainer.

This little bit of information bothers me. So I have determined to treat my new place as a gathering place with an open-door policy. It's open to anyone at any time, no advanced notice required. I hope to host a Bible study of sorts there, or at least a discussion/God-talk time. That's alot of my motivation for moving in the first place, to have a home suitable for having people over for coffee, sandwiches, or tea and crumpets. So I'm counting on my movers to help me make it a welcoming environment.

Let me add something here. Dang, this place looks empty. The furniture is still in place but with the CD's and DVD's boxed up and the bookshelves bare, it feels like a ghost-town. Nothing on the walls, the cabinets are empty and the cupboard is bare. Doesn't feel like my place anymore. That's okay, though. Forward progress.

Oh! I almost forgot something very important. I owe Virginia. She ragged on me all night, so I need to mention how she kept knocking things over with her butt. I am vindicated.

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Kudos to Heather who understood my reference to opposable thumbs in yesterday's post. It's from an episode of "Friends" so of course she knew it. And she managed to find the episode on youtube, something I tried to do but failed. You can watch it here.

If Charles Darwin had worked with me today, he would have changed his mind.

If life truly is like a box of chocolates, then mine must be a Whitman sampler.

I worked in the 'hood today. The 'hood. We actually work over that way alot but today I encountered something that left me with one of those stoned out, dazed and confused looks on my face. But then I laughed, uncontrollably, for half an hour.

The location was N. Castle Street, between E. Fifth Avenue and Woodbine Avenue. At lunchtime, I always try to find a shady spot to park in because my work truck is not air-conditioned. Les Miserables, by the way. So today I parked at the dead-end of Castle where there is a gate leading up to "Tiger Tops."

Yes, that would be the rear of the Knoxville Zoo, Gate 9, to be precise. The rear entrance, marked "Danger!" "Employees and Authorized Personnel Only!", is half a block from a residential neighborhood. Did you catch that? Let me re-phrase:

800-pound, predatory felines reside 1500 feet from small children and elderly ladies!!!

That is astonishing, or to quote, "That's asenine." But the large, carnivorous, African cats, a.k.a. "Kings of the jungle," are not the story today.

When lunch-time started, I needed to make a few calls. So I stepped out of the truck and proceeded to make said calls. I don't stand still, for those of you unfamiliar with me. I pace. I ended up leaning against the zoo's fence while I talked on the phone. All of a sudden, and without warning, I found myself standing here. At least it sounded like it.

I'm no Sherlock Holmes but it sounded to me like the barrier between the tigers' cage and the monkeys' cage must have collapsed. I watched the news but didn't see anything about it. Every single monkey/chimpanzee/orangutan/gorilla in the zoo started screaming at once. Not kidding, y'all. The Great Primate War has begun (Opposable thumbs!).

My phone conversation quickly deteriorated. Scientific fact: a human voice cannot overcome the volume of thirty or so pissed off missing links. The noise was unbelievable. You know the sound a monkey makes. Well, that's what I heard, but apparently through a Peavey sound system. And it seems to me that lions and tigers do not care for the sound of primates in unison. So they joined in with growls and roars. It was a completely chaotic symphony of the African savannah -- in the Knoxville ghetto.

So I put my phone away and stood there amazed at what I was hearing. The more I listened, the harder I laughed. Not sure why it was funny but it was. The harshness of the cacophony soon gave way to an enjoyment of hearing something so totally foreign to me. There was a beauty to it, mostly because it's not the usual dogs barking that I hear everyday. It was kind of other-worldly to stand there and be completely surrounded by the sound of it all.

And what would a good jungle safari story be without a little, "Alrighty, then!"

Mele Kalikimaka (only Hawaiian phrase I know, courtesy of "Christmas Vacation")

If only I had found this a week earlier. Go here and scroll down the page for something that will surely make you smile on Monday morning, if for no other reason than the fact that your wardrobe could be much worse. Personally, I hope we all get to wear these in heaven.

I am stoked about Friday night. It's a do-over for me and I always, always make the most of second chances. Even though my singing voice sounds worse than Stewart's blown out throat.

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Happy, happy birthday to Vanessa, who turns an elderly 23 today. Those of you who met her last week know that she doesn't look a day over 22. Still prayin' for your job, Ness.

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Goldy preached a good sermon to the fathers today. I don't have children (I think) (relax, it's a joke) but what he said spoke alot to me, too. His words about leadership, authority, godliness, discipline, being an example by showing an example, and a servant's heart apply to all of us in positions of influence and guidance.

I kept thinking about JGen and the youth. I am somewhat responsible for teaching and leading these most fabulous people, which sucks because I am afraid I'll mess them up. I seem to have a talent for screwing up people's lives. But that's the way God has designed it for now so I keep following and hoping more of Him, and less of me, comes through.

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The house deal is back on, albeit somewhat delayed. That means things that were already complicated just got exponentially complicated. So in a week that is completely too busy, I will be trying to pack and move. Or at least pack. I can move next week if necessary. Anyone who has free time this week who just really likes my company can call me at your convenience. Okay, let's just say anyone with free time.

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And finally, I am really glad everyone is back from camp. I didn't realize it until this past week but these past twelve months have changed me. I've always missed you guys when you aren't around but it's different now. This has been a year of building and strengthening relationships. Last week I didn't just miss everyone, I felt disconnected and lonely. In praying about it and trying to figure it out, God kinda showed me that my days of independence and emotional isolation are behind me. Gone is the time when I didn't need anyone but me. The Friday night crew and its leaders have become what I do. Call it a "calling" or whatever, but God has confirmed to me that "here" is where He wants me.

So that's my sappy time for the week. I love you guys and love having you all around. Don't let it go to your heads.

Have a good week.

Will there be Hobbits in heaven?

This is very, very cool.

But now Iluvatar sat and hearkened, and for a great while it seemed good to him, for in the music there were no flaws. But as the theme progressed, it came into the heart of Melkor to interweave matters of his own imagining that were not in accord with the theme of Iluvatar; for he sought therein to increase the power and glory of the part assigned to himself. To Melkor among the Ainur had been given the greatest gifts of power and knowledge, and he had a share in all the gifts of his brethren. He had gone often alone into the void places seeking the Imperishable Flame; for desire grew hot within him to bring into Being things of his own, and it seemed to him that Iluvatar took no thought for the Void, and he was impatient of its emptiness. Yet he found not the fire, for it is with Iluvatar. But being alone he had begun to conceive thoughts of his own unlike those of his brethren.

Some of these things he now wove into his music, and straightway discord rose about him, and many that sang nigh him grew despondent, and their thought was disturbed and their music faltered; but some began to attune their music to his rather than to the thought which they had at first. Then the discord of Melkor spread ever wider, and the melodies which had been heard before foundered in a sea of turbulent sound. But Iluvatar sat and hearkened until it seemed that about his throne there was a raging storm, as of dark waters that made war one upon another in an endless wrath that would not be assuaged.

Then Iluvatar arose, and the Ainur perceived that he smiled; and he lifted up his left hand, and a new theme began amid the storm, like and yet unlike to the former theme, and it gathered power and had new beauty.

Then Iluvatar spoke, and he said: "Mighty are the Ainur, and mightiest among them is Melkor; but that he may know, and all the Ainur, that I am Iluvatar, those things that ye have sung, I will show them forth, that ye may see what ye have done. And thou, Melkor, shalt see that no theme may be played that hath not its uttermost source in me, nor can any alter the music in my despite.

--from "Ainulindale", by J.R.R. Tolkien

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How you are fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning!

How you are cut down to the ground, you who made the nations low!

You said in your heart, "I will ascend to heaven; above the stars of God I will set my throne on high; I will sit on the mount of assembly in the far reaches of the north; I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will make myself like the Most High."

--Isaiah 14:12-14

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You've heard of The Lord of the Rings, which tells the events of Middle Earth at the end of the Third Age. This book I'm reading now, The Silmarillion, tells of the creation of the world and the events of the First Age. Ainulindale is a short story of Tolkien's that is included in, but not directly related to, The Silmarillion.

But in the preface to this book, Tolkien himself writes that these things were written to be accepted, "...by a mind that believes in the Blessed Trinity."

I am quite sure that none of you read my blog hoping for a book report, but when I read about Iluvatar (God), Melkor (Lucifer), the Ainur (angels), and the theme or music (worship), I grinned a little to myself. I just thought I'd share it.

How 'bout that. God created the Hobbits and Elves, too.

This one will be a letdown...(as if any of these posts are anything more than that)

Finally! Scientific proof that explains the dilemma in the church today.

I guess that was totally uncalled for but it's the first thing I thought of when I saw this graph.

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If any of you wonderful readers check this blog daily with the hopes of finding something enlightening and thought-provoking to read, then I'm sorry to disappoint you today. It's been an extremely mentally stressful week and I just don't have it in me to be creative or witty. I am fried.

But I'm really looking forward to Sunday and especially Sunday night. Our new study is really good and my guys, at least the three I had last week, seem to kinda get it. My big talker last week was Ivan Eddleman. Did you hear what I said? Ivan Eddleman talked...ALOT! He even said he was looking forward to the Audio Adrenaline concert party we're doing because, "It was a lot fun last year." I guess he's proof that you don't have to be jumping up and down to enjoy something. For those of you who don't know Ivan, picture a stone statue wearing a camo ballcap. I call him the Iceman. He doesn't get excited about anything.

Pray for the safe return of the campers today.

May the Lord bless you in your labors and increase your territories.

This and That

Here are a few mid-week things that serve no real purpose other than to let you know what is on my mind.

First, a very happy birthday to Ms. Mays who is probably counting gray hairs at this very moment. Dangit! See, I can't even be nice without not being nice. It's not from lack of effort, I assure you. Sorry, Heather. Let me try again. I hope you have a fabulous birthday, free of smart-aleck comments from jerks like me. ;)

Remember, "Gray hair is a crown of glory; it is gained in a righteous life." --Proverbs 16:31 (Shoot. Oh, well.)

Seriously, you're a special person. Have a great day.

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Next, I've decided that selling your house is probably the number one leading cause of suicide among single, thirty-seven year old, color-blind, white, evangelical Christian males.

I'm about twelve days from closing and the banking industry is still throwing curveballs. Something about FHA and appraisals and blah, blah. At this rate, I'll be homeless and sleeping under the shed at Arrowhead pool in my Steve Urkel sleeping bag.

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I was thinking alot today about honesty. Best policy, right? Thou shall not lie and all that? Well, if all that is true, which obviously it is because it's Scripture, then why do people always go ballistic when I tell them the truth? I mean, I am usually a reserved kind of guy who thinks before he speaks, chooses his words wisely, and tries to say what I mean and mean what I say, in humility, when possible. But on those occasions when I am led, prayerfully, to spew my guts and say or do exactly what's on my heart, it seems to up-end the very fabric of existence itself. I am perplexed by that. Do people not like the truth? Or is it just me?

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And finally, a verse that has been on my mind, and I share it as encouragement for you.

Cast your burden upon the Lord; He will never allow the righteous to be shaken. --Psalm 55:22

Please continue to pray for Benji and the camp crew.

Fine-tuning

First and foremost, I want to ask that everyone prays this week for our students who are away at camp. That is, anyone who is left to read this. Most of my followers are the students I just mentioned.

But anyway, I pray that God would touch them and work in their hearts as much, if not more, than He did last year. I love them all dearly and they are without a doubt the best people on the planet. It is my hearts desire to see them all walk as close to God as He intends.

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I had the opportunity to teach my Sunday School class this morning in the absence of Jason. When he asked me to fill in, I groaned. Every single time he asks me to teach for him, and I mean every time, the lesson is directed at me. I think the people at Lifeway are reading my mail.

God is light, and in Him is no darkness at all. If we say we have fellowship with Him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth. --1 John 1:5,6

So the lesson was about knowing of our salvation, and three indicators that John wrote about that can clue us in to our spiritual state. I don't struggle with doubts over my salvation, not anymore. But I have in the past. What I do struggle with is just how deep is my love for God? Do I really love Him the way I profess? Do I love Him enough to truly turn away from the darkness and deny myself? The verse above is clear... no one can live in sin and disobedience and be at peace with God.

And by this we know that we have come to know Him, if we keep His commandments. Whoever says "I know Him" but does not keep His commandments is a liar, and the truth is not in him, but whoever keeps His word, in him truly the love of God is perfected. By this we may know that we are in Him: whoever says he abides in Him ought to walk in the same way in which he walked. --1 John 2:3-6

So what struck me while preparing this lesson is that I'm tired of excuse-making. Too often I hear, and say, "It's alright. We all sin. God will forgive you (or me)." True, God is forgiving. But there's a point where we take that grace as a license to sin. We've reduced "once saved, always saved" to a cop-out. We disobey God repeatedly, pick ourselves up and dust off, say "Oops!", and then run right back out to the sinning fields for another go.

We will sin, no getting around that. But we have been given the Spirit of God in us to give us the power to resist. The proof is in the last part of the Scripture above. We, "...ought to walk in the same way in which He walked."

I really am tired of excusing myself, and others. I am over professing to love God with all my heart and seeking to follow Him when I know that my habitual disobedience to His word and my sin patterns display otherwise. It's time for a change.

I want to be at peace with God. I want to see Him move in my life and in the lives of those in my circle of influence. I want to be so in tune with Him that I see prayers answered every moment of the day. I want to hear Him and watch Him perform miracles in the lives of those I love.

It all starts with a choice. My choice to keep His commandments, out of love for Him, and therefore see His love perfected. Maybe this sounds like a radical, 360 degree turn around but it's honestly about just a few small things that need to be tweaked. But those small things might as well be mountains when compared to a holy and righteous God.

Well, I guess I've vomited enough here. Next time, I think I'll tell Jason, NO!

Have a wonderful week.

Some irreverant humor to end your week on

Corny or not, it made me laugh really, really hard.

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I hope everyone has a great weekend.

When a good title escapes you...

...you should just leave it blank.

Three things then off to bed.

1) Virginia -- have a great time, don't drink the water, I'm jealous, be safe, and remember, I told you your dream guy would be named Chavo.

2) Vanessa -- I hope you enjoyed hanging out with our awkward little crew. Thanks for coming and come back anytime. Benji might need help figuring out where his obscure references came from.

3) Speaking of Benji, what a brief but powerful message tonight. If anyone struggles with behaving the way that they feel instead of showing Christ, it's me. I am an open book when it comes to what my mood is. One look at me and anyone can tell how I'm feeling inside. But that needs to change.

I don't have a problem with cruelty or meanness or anything overtly offensive to people. I'm just not made that way because I'm too laid back. But I have always been the type to walk into a room and isolate myself from dozens of people if things aren't going my way or someone isn't treating me like they normally do. I am way too analytical when it comes to others. But as the Grand High Potentate pointed out tonight, the excuse that, "I can't help it, that's just how I am," is a load of crap. In Christ, the way we are, and should be, is like Christ.

The fruits of the Spirit aren't a list to choose from. They are the manifestation of God's Spirit in us. All of them. Bad days will happen but it is in those times that we must remain focused on how we should be acting instead of how we feel like acting.

And spiritual gifts? Well, I don't know of anywhere in the Bible that we are told to determine our particular gift and ignore the rest. To say, "I am gifted with teaching so I don't have to exhibit mercy," or, "I have administration so that exempts me from service," is about as far from Christlike as I can imagine. We all have a predominant gift, but we should never accept that as a free pass from other gifts. Jesus was a healer, a teacher, merciful, a servant, an admonisher, a prophet, etc., etc. You get the point.

I get overwhelmed very easily. When that happens, I get quiet and withdraw from people. It's not that I set out to be rude, it's just that my mind is working overtime and I fear saying the wrong thing with the wrong tone if I speak. The drawback to thinking before you speak is that sometimes it prevents you from speaking at all.

So I have to change a few things. I have to pay attention to how I act, all the time, and strive to act more like Christ, all the time. For me, I think that means rejoicing in how truly good and blessed my life is especially when my momentary circumstances portray the opposite.

Anyway, feel free to call me out on this. That's what we're all here together for right?

Oh! By the way, Benji's house on Friday night. 7 p.m.

Ch-ch-change.

Congratulations to Shane and Mitzi. They were married on Saturday, June 6.

And Happy Birthday to her as well.

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Our new Sunday night study is titled "Fresh Start." Obviously, my sister's wedding symbolizes a new beginning, too. It's a new phase of life with new visions and expectations. So, naturally, I started thinking about "new" and "fresh" as the topic of the day and tried to let God lead my thoughts about the whole subject.

I thought about the times in my own life when I started out on a new path. Times when I forced the old things to change into a new life, a clean slate. And I thought about people in my life who face those decisions about new directions.

I have always looked at change in the positive. Change is good, new directions, new missions to undertake, blah, blah, blah. But I think I have been wrong about that alot.

Change is good. Change is bad.

There's no all-encompassing, across the board viewpoint when it comes to fresh starts. Just because something is new and exciting doesn't mean it's good. Just because something appears to be a cure-all solution doesn't make it the obvious choice.

Everything must be weighed with God's wisdom. I believe that the litmus test for these crossroad decisions is simple: Will it make me better, will it lead me closer to God?

For instance, my sister's new marriage is great. Shane has been a wonderful influence in her life. He's a super guy with a friendly, peaceful demeanor and he'll bend over backward for you. Mitzi has been much happier since meeting him. They attend church together and their beliefs match up.

Then there's Spenarah (sorry if this embarrasses you but your helping me to make my point). They will be attending a new college this year. I'm thrilled to have them close to home again. It wasn't a smooth transition, they faced some opposition but now that it's a done deal I sense that they are at peace with their decision and their ministries and involvement at church have been, and will be stronger and more effective. But I will miss driving up to see dear, sweet Edna.

So it's easy to see God in these things. He leads us to changes sometimes that we don't see coming but give us new purpose. Scratch that. Not so much a new purpose but a renewed purpose that builds on where we have been and strengthens our sphere of influence.

But what about the other side of the coin? Sometimes we make those decisions that take us the other way. We decide that it's just time for something different because we're bored or in a slump or not really feeling God that much. We find all kinds of reasons to justify making a move by putting it in God's lap and changing everything around us, when we should stop and see that the changes need to be made within us. I've done this many times. I've told myself that it's natural to drift away from the friends I have and my ministries at church. My work here is done, God has led me to new things, I've been "called" to something else. It's easy to be led away and follow self, follow the world, or follow someone else.

All I'm saying is that some new paths are good, but some are not. Some are temptations to lead us away. Some are from God and some are from the Deceiver. Society these days has too many choices. We are programmed to look at all our options and choose the one that's best for us. But we don't always know what's best. We just think we do.

But taking the time to seek God's wisdom and count the cost is foolproof. If we let Him guide us based on what He wants, not what we think He would want if we were God, then the number of choices and the confusion will diminish.

God isn't a chess player. We aren't pawns in a strategy.

I hope this helps someone in the days to come.

I love the ocean... for more than one reason.

He does not retain His anger forever, because He delights in steadfast love. He will again have compassion on us; He will tread our iniquities under foot. You will cast all our sins into the depths of the sea. --Micah 7:18,19

I, I am He who blots out your transgressions for My own sake, and I will not remember your sins. --Isaiah 43:25

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand. --Isaiah 41:10

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This is one of my favorite songs. Ever.

Talk about a "Hallelujah, Praise God, Thank You, Jesus" lyric. Everytime I hear it I think about what it means. I think about all the "misdeeds" that have characterized my life and then about the mighty wave that wiped them away.

Nothing is unforgivable. No sin is too great that it will not sink beneath the depths of that sea. Nowhere that we have drifted is too far for His hand to reach.

I have made my share of mistakes. Too many. And too often. But every single one of them, from the unnoticed ones to the life-changing ones, have been seen and felt by God. And every single one of them has been blotted out, forgotten.

Think about what a great deal we're getting. We get to be intimate with the Creator of all things, forgiven, renewed, and restored for every offense, and all we have to do is admit those offenses to Him and walk away from them.

Happy Tuesday, folks.

Sigh... just some random stuff

Couldn't decide which person I wanted to embarrass so I chose to go with someone who will probably (hopefully) never see this. If she does, then I will pay with my life.

For Pete's sake, and mine, please, I beseech you, don't rat me out. But she's sure to get high marks in heaven for being married to a youth minister and living with Ben and Benn.

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It's late but I'm blogging anyway because when I miss a few days, I get chewed out 'til 4:30 in the morning. Not kidding. ;) Okay, chewed out is a little strong but guilt-tripped, nonetheless. But, as is the norm in Chucky-land these days, I'm wide awake. Yep. You guessed it... the house.

I survived the inspection last week. And guess what? I get another one! Man, am I blessed or what? Yay, me!

Stupid financial institutions. Now they want to come out and inspect the house for safety and code compliance or some crap. Here's a heads-up: the house is 60 years old. It does not comply with current codes. That ain't rocket science.

Oh well. Just more to tolerate.

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I found some hilarious greeting cards the other day. The guy who started the company says that he grew tired of shopping for Christian cards but never finding any that were humorous. If you get time, go to Inherit the Mirth and browse around. Sometimes, to be humorous, you have to push the line a little bit.

I really like the one where they show some camels with bumper stickers on their rear-ends. "My son is an honor student" and "My son is a medical student". Then Mary and Joseph's camel: "My son is God".

My favorite? Surfin' on the Mount.

That's funny right there, I don't care who you are.

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Dr. Golden said something today that really made me laugh but also parted the clouds a little.

This is one of those "duh" things but sometimes hearing it put a certain way clears the mud. He was talking about making sense in our choices. He mentioned people who always want to pray about things and how some things require zero prayer. His example was of a married man and woman (not to each other) who were having an affair. They told him they had prayed about it and felt it was God's will. Anybody else see a problem there?

You can fill in the blank with any situation you want to but his point was that we don't have to pray about things that God has commanded us to not do. If the Bible says don't do it, then prayer isn't going to gain you a different answer.

Like I said, it's pretty cut-and-dried but the way it was preached today made it speak. Good job, Goldy.

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Finally, I've told Spenser before that I'm the "Don't" guy. Just ask me and I'll tell you a bunch of things that I've done that people should not do. My mistakes for your benefit. You're welcome.

Anyway, I've recently discovered another "don't."

Don't iron naked.

Have a great Monday.

"Memories are made of this... "

It's hard to believe but this little feller turned one year old today.  Check out those walking skills.  Or I should say those high-knee, stomping skills.

Happy Birthday, baby Izamac.  By the time you're old enough to read this, I'll probably be dead or something so your folks will just have to pass that along.

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So I've come to realize that when you sell your house and get prepared to move, excitement quickly gives way to exhaustion.  There aren't enough hours in the day, or days on the calendar.

I am currently trying to get the place in shape for the home inspection on Thursday.  The aggravating part of this is that the inspection is the buyer's prerogative.  It does me no good whatsoever.  Just something to tolerate until closing.  So, essentially I have to stay up late and bust my rumpus to clean around all the stuff that will be gone in a few weeks.  Sheesh!

The house is a wreck, anyway.  Looks like a category 4 hurricane came through.  I just started a new jigsaw puzzle, too.  That means my dining room table has 1,500 little pieces scattered about on it, pieces that I will have to pick up and re-box until I'm quaintly settled in at the new place.  The puzzle does, however, do a fabulous job of camouflaging burned spots that may have "developed" on said table.

Then there are the six new books on my coffee table.  If I simply shelf them until I'm moved, I chance forgetting about them, something that would be truly tragic.  So I will have to either read very fast or dedicate to them their own box at move time.  We'll go with option B.

I don't have alot of stuff.  But right now my stuff seems to be replicating.  Who in the world needs 11 Bibles?  I use them for cross-referencing and such, but today I stopped and looked at them and felt like some collector or something.  That's it, I collect God's Word, because I'm so super spiritual and righteous and stuff.  (that's sarcasm, y'all).  I feel like I have my own little Vatican archives.

As I pondered the impending move, I wondered if I should feel any sentiment or sadness about leaving.  I've heard people talk about that, how they were leaving memories behind and all the good times in their home.  Oddly, though, I don't really feel that way.

I've been here almost 10 years.  It will always be my first owned home.  At times it's been a sanctuary, other times a prison.  The memories run the gamut from treasured to, "Please, God, make me forget."  I've had joyous, unforgettable Christmases and torturously lonely ones, too.  I've laughed my head off and cried my eyes out.  I've fallen on my knees in my room in awe of God and paced the floors screaming out to Him at the top of my lungs.  I've had some special times that I'll never forget with people who have changed my life.

But, even after all that, I don't feel overly attached to the house.  Maybe because it's always been an incomplete home.  It holds my belongings and my personality (Shaker, according to Sarah), but just me, no one else to jazz it up.  It's kinda like being stuck in your own head all the time (if your head contains furniture and carries insurance).

What I mean is it's kinda like a church building.  the building itself is warm and inviting, but all the good things that go on and all the memories and special times there are due to the inhabitants.  God doesn't live there.  He lives in the hearts of the members, all those who serve there, pray there, cry there, get hitched there and are buried there.

So it is with me and my little chunk of dirt here.  It's been a blessing and God has always provided the means for me to keep it paid for and in good repair.  But all the awesome times and memories, all the love and joy, all the heartache and times of brokenness and growth will not stay behind.  They aren't contained in the four walls of a house.  They will move with me.  They are safe and secure in my aging mind and tiny, cold heart.  

So I'm ready!!!  Let's get to movin'.