I've been chastised for not posting...

..so I'm posting. I guess I've not had much to say. Or maybe I haven't felt like saying it. Either way, here's something for anyone who still tunes in to this station.

I'm learning again. Seems like I do that alot. And as always, I'm learning from my mistakes, many as they are. I'll spare you the intricacies but suffice it to say that my long, winding, crooked road has been made straight again.

You see, I'm a drifter. Not the Hollywood, Clint Eastwood kind who blows through town and saves the helpless widow from the greedy land-grabber, but a spiritual drifter. Most Christians have guardrails on their road to keep them between the lines, but my road is lined with steep drop-offs and precipices. (I've always wanted to use precipice in a sentence.)

So I drifted away, yet again. I've been kinda fakin' it for the last few months. Attending church, teaching, smiling and praying, but only superficially. Then, I was asked to lead "Downpour." I said yes (because I always seem to say yes), but really wasn't into it. Poor attitude. But my childhood-instilled work ethic convinced me that if I was going to lead this study, I must apply myself wholeheartedly. So I did. I followed the exercises to the letter, made the prescribed prayer times, and read everything the book instructed. Then we got to the sin chapter.

It's called "Sin in the Mirror" for a reason. The daily exercises caused me to look at myself in an honest manner and to give God the freedom to plow through my heart like a John Deere. I prayed the "do the surgery, God, and get it all" prayer and sat back.

Here's a tip: when you ask God to search your heart and remove the things that are roadblocks to Him, don't use the surgery metaphor. God doesn't use anesthetic.

I was confronted with things I knew were there, but wanted to hold onto. And I was shown some new things. I don't mean "new" as in shiny, new, favorite Christmas toy, either. I mean fresh, as in fresh, open, bleeding wound.

But the most intense part was that the study encouraged us to not move straight into the "confess it and move on" stage. We were encouraged to wallow. You won't hear that from Lakewood, folks.

Refer to 2 Corinthians 7:8-11 if you want to read it for yourself. Heartfelt sorrow and grief over our sins is a key part of the process. We need to be made to hate our sins, to be disgusted by them and to feel the full weight of the wrongs we have committed. That won't happen if we hurry and brush them off like a bee that is threatening to sting. We must be stung.

I have to say that I have realized that any Bible study you undertake is only as good as your commitment to it. "Downpour" isn't that different from "Crazy Love" or "Experiencing God" or "Purpose-Driven Mail Delivery Truck." But for me, it felt like a last chance of sorts. I felt like God brought it my way as a final warning that some very old, very deep-rooted things had to go, and go now.

They're going. That's the praise in all of this. I've been delivered of some things. Some of them a decade old, believe it or not. I don't think it's over. That's okay, though, because there are some replacement things that are amazing. I haven't felt this light in a very long time.

So there. Judging by the reaction in our small group, I think I'm the only one who is really feeling this whole downpour thing. I guess that's okay, too. It seems that God brought me to it for this purpose. Who am I to argue with that? A $17.00 book fee is a small price to pay for the renewed presence of God and peace.

Peace out.

Stay thirsty my friends...

I assume you've all seen the ads with the "most interesting man in the world." I've been perusing the Facebook page where people post they're own phrases for him. I've been absolutely rolling with laughter so I thought I'd share some of my favorites. For reference, one of the best from the actual commercials says, "He is the life of parties he's never attended."

"He once touched a jellyfish... and stung it."

"The cable installer waits for him from 9 a.m. til 1 p.m."

"He could reverse global warming with a cold stare."

"It is said the universe expands around him."

"He ended the Never Ending Story."

"It is said he gave DaVinci the code."

"Butterflies feel him in their stomach when they fall in love." (love that one!)

"He's so successful his insurance covered his birth."

"Horses hang his shoes on the wall for good luck."

"He is the reason the chicken crossed the road."

"He told Victoria the secret."

"Puberty had to go through him."

"His motto is, 'Safety third.'"

"He wrote the songs that make the whole world sing."

"He was once quoted saying, 'Don't quote me on this.'"

"His mom has a tattoo that says "Son."

"Wishing wells throw coins at him."

"The Swiss use his bank."

"When he went to Pamplona, the bulls ran with him."

"When he's in Rome, the Romans do as he does."

"He spent a winter in Canada and all the birds flew north."

"He made Journey stop believing."

"The Tower of Pisa leaned just to get in a picture with him."

"Roses stop to smell him."

"Stars wish upon him."

"Rabbits consider his foot good luck."

"Four leaf clovers look for him."

"The eight ball asks him for advice."

You get the picture.

Observations

(First of all, newer, happier look. The deary, rainy clouds were getting me down.)

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I'm a brand new Facebooker. Yeah, late bloomer. I've actually been very adamant about not joining in the past, but I was finally worn down.

The story goes, my 20 year class reunion is coming up. One of the reunion coordinator ladies kept sending me Facebook invitations (which I continually ignored). She built it up as the perfect way to stay in the know about reunion plans, reconnect with long lost classmates, blah, blah, blah. Not interested. Then, I had an opportunity come up that will require some nominal networking in the future. So, when I got the next Facebook invitation, things started clicking in my head (not the normal noises I hear), and I realized that it was indeed time to join the rest of civilization.

So I started the process of building my friends list and profile. I've noticed a few things while I've been doing this.

First, the bio. I can't help but wonder how different my bio, and probably everyone else's, would be if Facebook had been invented fifteen years ago. I actually had to stop and think about what I would write in mine. Is that strange?

I'm sitting alone at my computer, creating my Facebook profile and can't think of the things that make me interesting. That's kinda sad, come to think of it. But I actually did struggle with it. I think it's because there have been many different Chuck's through the years.

Our bio's are pretty much determined by where we are in life at the time we're writing them, so at any given time, the bio could be completely different than what it is now. Mine currently reflects that my life's activities revolve around church and what I'm involved in there. But just a few years ago, it would have been about my circle of friends and all the running around we did and how life was a party.

So it's not really a bio. I think it's more of a snapshot. Take a new snapshot every so often and update.

Then there's the "friends." Really? I mean isn't that a very loose interpretation of the word? I'm sure the Facebook founders wanted it to appeal to the lonely hearters around the world but maybe it should be more categorized.

How do you define who friends are? I've always thought that friends were special. Real friends are few and far between and we're lucky if we have more than a few in our lifetimes. Friendships are one of those spiritual-level things, trust and love level things that shouldn't be tossed around based on the whims of the day. But it seems that that view is changing. These days, a friend can be someone you've actually never spoken to in person.

Popping out a request to someone because they seem interesting isn't really making a friend. It's making a contact. I think friends are made through tougher processes.

I've noticed that, when I introduce someone, I will add to the word "friend" based on our relationship. I might say, "this is my good friend" or "let me introduce you to a buddy of mine." But without really ever realizing it, I have a category reserved for those few that I really, really consider a true friend.

I introduce them as "dear" friend. I don't really know when or where I started doing that. I can recall many times over the past few years when I've used that term for those that I know beyond doubt are real, true, walk through hell with you friends. As I said, they are very rare. I think they're getting even more rare, sadly.

So I advocate being able to divide our Facebook friend lists. We should have tags that we can apply to their profiles that describe the type of friend they are. And when it posts on someone's wall, it can say things like, "Chuck is a dear friend of so and so."

Or how about, "Chuck sent a request to this person but he doesn't really know him."

Make friends, y'all. But more importantly, be a friend to those you already have.

Abandonment issues.

I believe I've mentioned in the past that the story of Joseph is probably my favorite in the Bible. Today, I read it again, and once again, am amazed.

First, those dreams. I wonder how it would feel to have two dreams in which you're told you will be head over your brothers and parents? Freaky, I'm guessing. Especially when you're that young and your brothers all come from different mamas.

Then, you oopsie by letting your future-subservient bro's get wind of it. Not good in a culture where order of birth is the only career ladder and you're at the bottom.

But Joe kept on being Joe. He actually went out in to the countryside to check on his brothers who hated him. I'm no genius, but...

So, as you most likely know, Brother A wants to kill, Brother B says no, Brothers C-J decide to sell him and fake his death. Complete with goat's blood chalk outline.

What would it feel like to be abandoned in a pit by your brothers, and all because of Pa's favoritism? I have to believe that Joseph wasn't just sitting there, playing BrickBreaker on his Blackberry. I would imagine he was heart-broken, scared, bawling his eyes out, and wondering what went wrong. One minute he's walking to Dothan to check on his family, his loved ones, and the next he's curled up in a hole, awaiting his fate by their hands. I'm guessing that hurt a bit.

Years later, Joseph is Potiphar's butler. The Bible says that, "The Lord was with Joseph, and he became a successful man." BMOC at Potiphar's crib. Then, the lady of the house gets all touchy-feely and ruins it. Joseph had "found favor in Potiphar's sight" but then Miss "Real Housewife of Egypt"screws it all up. And good master and boss Potiphar puts Joe in the brig. Abandoned again by those he had come to trust.

But the very next verse (40:21) is one of those hallelujah moments for me. It says, "But the Lord was with Joseph and showed him steadfast love." Apparently, Joseph's being in prison was of no concern to God's overall plan, whatsoever. It was just one more way of showing His glory. And Joseph finds favor in the sight of the warden.

Joseph takes on a sidejob as dream whisperer for Pharaoh's kitchen staff while he's there. He asks the cupbearer to remember him and mention him to Pharaoh, but the cupbearer forgets him. How do you forget the one person who gave you hope while you were in prison? It's beyond me, but still, Joseph is abandoned yet again, for two whole years.

So how would you react if your life was characterized by the people you love, the people you're closest to, the people you trust with your life abandoning you over and over? Me? Not nearly as honorable as Joseph reacted.

All through his life, Joseph faced the pain of being thrown around by the decisions and whims of other people. But there's no indication that he ever let it destroy him. I find that fascinating.

What's even more fascinating to me is that throughout the rest of Genesis (9 chapters), Joseph weeps 7 times. But it's not the "Awww, there, there" kind. He weeps from joy, compassion, tenderness. He has one of those Vestal Goodman hanky-wavin' cries and it involves his being reunited with those rotten brothers from the pit episode, and his diddy.

Wow. A lifetime of people turning their backs on him and he still has the kindness to forgive and let it go. Unbelievable.

I wish I could be like Joseph.

Blahg.

Complete with fashion model-type leg pose. Sarah had a headache on this particular evening, which I have diagnosed as altitude sickness. Say what you want about them, but I think they're purty. And they can sure put away some seafood.

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Next, I learned tonight that Legos are a Danish invention. Why that's interesting, I have no idea. But there are approximately 50 little, plastic Lego blocks for every human being on the planet. That's a lot of semi-circular squares, which is all I've ever been able to build with them.

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Next again, I assume you all heard about the fiasco with the French soccer team during the World Cup. Apparently, one of the players had it out with a coach or something, and the rest of the spoiled, over-paid, bratty, Frenchy futballers walked out on a practice in support of the original spoiled, over-paid, bratty, Frenchy futballer. Birds of a feather...

I heard (on BBC World News America) a street interview with some French people who are obviously rather put out with their national team. I nearly hyperventilated when one of them said (in an Inspector Clouseau voice), "It shames me right now that I am French, but, c'est la vie!"

Gotta love the French.

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Now, some tragic news. I went to the doc today for some recurring aches and pains. For the first time in my life, I have high blood pressure. High enough to have to carefully watch it for a few weeks, anyway. Lose weight, watch what you eat, exercise more -- I thought that was the normally prescribed cure. Well, I'm actually about 7 pounds underweight and get more than enough exercise due to the nature of my jobby-job. So I guess it's stress-related. Actually, I am very aware of what is causing my heart to work like an overloaded locomotive (didn't tell that to sawbones) and have determined that there is no quick fix. Oh well, c'est la vie. But that's not the tragic part.

I also have severe, extreme, violent, hostile, belligerent, war-mongering, bent on my demise heartburn. I've actually had it pretty much every day for the last three years or so (didn't tell him that, either). As we were discussing remedies, he asked if I still used tobacco. Umm... yep.

"That needs to go."

Ouch.

"Do you have a high caffeine intake?" Do six Mountain Dews per day qualify as high intake?

"That needs to go."

Ouch. And dang.

"Do you eat much chocolate?" Man! This guy hates me!

OUUCCCHHH!!!

"Might you recommend putting honey in my ears and having me fall asleep on an anthill?"

For those of you who don't know me, fudge-flavored, Mountain Dew snuff runs through my veins. And in one 20 minute doctor's appointment, this bird has been asked to stop singing. No Fudge Rounds, no Mountain Dew, and no chewing tobacco. I ask you, what kind of madman would ask Michaelangelo to stop painting?

So, Lord help me, I have to make some changes. Three 25-year addictions must end. I'm wagering that I will end first.

But I'm in search of a new bad habit, if anyone has suggestions.

"What's all the hub-bub, Bub?"

If anyone of you tried to drive through east Knoxville on Saturday, then you most likely experienced some difficulty. Pictured above is the reason why. It's a big, honkin'... red thing.

Actually, it's a steam power generator for Virginia Power, and it caused me to have to get out of my comfy bed at 3:45 am.

I have no idea what it's gonna do or why it's so big or any other details, but I do know that it cost 40 million dollars, plus an additional 10 million to move. It came from Germany via ship to Forks of the River Industrial Park.

My job, and that of three of my co-workers, was to stay ahead of this thing and make sure the phone cables were high enough for it to pass under. Mission accomplished. Barely.

In the photo, you can see just how close it came to the cables. The shiny, silver thing in the lower-right corner is the fairlead on the aerial lift I was in. We use the fairlead to grab the cables and move them around. I was approximately 20 feet over the road when this thing passed and I very easily could have reached down and touched it as it went by me.

It really was amazing to see something this big moving down the road. It was around 225 feet long and weighed around 640 tons. That's 1,280,000 pounds. Earlier in the day, I was standing about two feet from it's tires as it went by me and I could feel the ground undulating as it rolled by. It was kinda freaky feeling.

So, I snapped this picture after it went under the last cables I was responsible for. Two minutes later, I was packed up and heading for home, nine hours after it first moved out. Nine hours. Seven miles.

Anyway, nothing of any great importance but it was something you don't do everyday. And it was gravy overtime. We only had to lift cables about three times. The rest of the time, we waited.

Oh! By the way, this was the first one. I'm told the next one is bigger. And is it just me or do the "OVERSIZE LOAD" signs make you laugh?

Thank you, Captain Obvious.

This one's for the ladies...

The sun, the waves, the glistening sand... and a quarter-slot. Paradise does indeed exist.

There you go, gals... you're fairy tale come true.

Funniest quote of the week... so far.

I'll get to that in a minute, but first, I have a secret. Most folks don't know that I have a secret obsession. Supercars. More specifically, European-bred, Formula One inspired supercars. They are called that for obvious reasons.

Most of the models that fall into this category are unbelievably expensive, mind-blowingly fast, and look more like functional art than a daily driver. They come with horsepower ratings above 500 and top speed ratings that good ol' Amurrikan cars would blush at.

Pictured below is the Lexus LFA. Brand-new, Japanese, and my current choice in the 300,000 dollar range. Performance-wise, there are better, less expensive choices. But I just really like the looks of this car. Smooth. And it's been called an engineer's masterpiece, because of all the gadgets and innovations that have gone into it's 9-year conception.

I get my supercar fix each week by watching Top Gear on BBC America. It's quite possibly the most informative car show, and possibly the funniest show on TV. Three awkward British guys testing cars and trying to completely embarrass each other is hard to beat. Which brings me to the quote.

In a recent episode, they were interviewing their celebrity guest for the week... Mark Wahlberg. He's a car guy, as most celebrities are. The host was asking him about his car collection and emphasized that he owned a Mercedes Brabus. The host then asked Wahlberg, "Doesn't Tom Cruise also own one of those?"

I've never cared much for Mark Wahlberg until this moment. He gave the British guy a "do I look like I care" look and replied:

"I don't really know. We attend different churches. I'm at the one with Jesus."

I blew Mountain Dew and Copenhagen across my living room.

By the way, I'm saving up for this purchase, in case your led to make a donation. I currently need $274,990.00 Thank you for your support.

Uh oh... it's that word again.

When the word "accountability" is mentioned, you can just see people tighten up a bit. I wonder why that is? For the most part, people will agree that accountability is what's missing in most Christian circles today. Everyone seems to believe that we all should be held accountable to each other for our actions but nobody ever really gets around to doing it. At least doing it correctly.

We discussed this in Sunday school today. Eli and his boys were judged by God and the whole nation of Israel was disciplined because of the lack of accountability on the part of Eli the "fat" priest. Samuel, being the godly and obedient one, had to confront Eli about his sin and proclaim God's judgment on his family. Later on, Israel was completely routed by the Philistines; the sons, Hophni and Phineas, were killed, and clumsy Eli broke his chair and died. Israel also lost the ark of the covenant to the Philistines. And such is the discipline of a holy God.

So, applying this to our lives today, is our level of accountability at a point where God would intervene and discipline us accordingly? How many times have we been aware of the sins of our closest friends and turned a deaf ear? How often do we ignore the counsel of those who approach us and confront us about the sinful things we are doing?

Let's face it. You can all think of several people in your close circle who are involved in things that don't agree with God's standards. And we can all point out things like that in our own lives. Mostly, we just go along, ignoring these things and acting like it's none of our business because if we get involved, then we are opening ourselves up for others to get into our business. So we play dumb. We don't want to be judgmental, after all. We act as if it's not our place to speak up against sin.

But the Bible clearly says otherwise. Here in 1 Samuel and later on in most all of Paul's letters, we are expected to be each other's spiritual alarms. What good is true fellowship without it?

What would happen if we really believed that ignoring sin was a bad thing? Sin is destructive behavior and leads to destroyed relationships, pain and heartache. It can hold back entire churches from fulfilling God's purposes. It can and does destroy lives. But we act like it's not a problem if we don't rock the boat. We think that because of God's deep love for us, sin is just something that He'll overlook just like we do.

We are fond of quoting Scripture that proclaims the unchanging God. He's the same as He's always been. But we act like He's become a mellowed out old man who doesn't have the stomach for being tough on His children anymore. That's what He did in the Old Testament; laid back, hippie Jesus took care of all the bad stuff and He isn't as strict.

Grace has become a "free spin" on Wheel of Fortune. It's a coupon that we cash in when we feel heat from our conscience due to our wrongdoing. Play the grace card, say a quick altar prayer, maybe roll out a tear or two, and it's all good. Clean slate.

I think that we don't really regard sin as a bad thing anymore. We aren't disgusted by it, we don't run from it, we don't view it as an obstacle in our relationship with God. We simply dismiss it as part of this fallen world, we're only human and, bless our hearts, one day we'll be free from it but until then, we'll keep throwing ourselves on the grace wagon.

Grace is the greatest gift God ever bestowed. It's a result of the awful punishment that Christ endured for us. When we blow it off as our own personal cop out, we mock the crucifixion. We treat Jesus worse than those who persecuted Him. At least they took Him seriously.

If we really want the things we say we want, then we need to start recognizing and confronting sin. We have to get over our habit of prioritizing sin and realize that, ultimately, bad language is just as destructive as rape. Lies are just as harmful as murder. Selfishness and pride influence people's view of the power of Christ just as much as drug abuse and pornography.

The church is struggling in today's world. We can pat ourselves on the back all we want but, overall, lost people are dying lost. The gospel isn't being spread. People's lives remain miserable and unchanged. God removed His glory from Israel due to her sin and lack of accountability and reverence. Do we think we are any better? Are we above the discipline of God? No, but we act like it.

It seems to me that the reason true accountability is so rare is because we don't want to be unpopular. Standing up for God's standards is no easy thing, and in our minds, doing so will cost us those treasured friendships. Honestly, this is my weakness. Who wants to be in a crowd of one?

So standing strong requires standing together. When we all commit to turning our backs on what we think is right and return to God and what He says is right, then maybe we'll start to see Him glorified in the community, and beyond.

Your homework is this: begin to change your attitude toward sin. Be willing to listen to those who love you enough to confront you about the harmful things in your life, even if you aren't willing to admit that they are harmful. And be aware of each other. Pay attention to the people you love, watch for behavioral changes and changes in attitude that may be indicators of something going wrong.

I doubt you'll have to look very far or very hard. Real love means getting involved. Staying out of the way is just loving and protecting yourself.

Death Journal #2

First, I'm sure you noticed the changes. Just playing with some new Blogger features. I'll settle in a few days.

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I posted a few days ago about contemplating death. I cheesed that one up a bit but I still have some thoughts about it.

So, what if? What if death was certain to come long before it was expected? I'm still working from the perspective of the last few months of 2010 being the last few months. Ever.

In thinking about all of this, I've realized that nearly everyone has an idea of what they want their life to be, but it's always from hindsight. That is, looking back on their life from their deathbed, taking inventory and hoping that it was something worth remembering. Preachers talk about this a lot when they are on the topic of leaving legacies or living a life of character and whatnot. But I've been thinking about what my life has meant up to this point, if this were the last point.

It seems to me that family-oriented people want to be remembered for the way their children turned out. Those who have multiple young 'uns seem to almost always form some sort of long term plan and center everything around guiding their kids into that plan. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying anything against that. Whether it be family businesses or raising a family basketball team, some folks put their legacy into what they leave behind in their children.

For others, it's their career. These people are easy to spot because they are the ones who live their work. You know the type. No matter if they're at home, church, Food City, mowing the yard, or on the john, they have Blackberry in hand and they are talking about the office. And they manage to take a work-centered, spiritual approach to everything.

I could go on and on about the different views people have about how life should look from the far end, but what about the differences those lives make in the lives of others? Isn't that why we're really here to begin with?

I think of all the people I know and have known and how different all those folks were from each other. I have been blessed to get to know so many people in my quickly lengthening life and I think I've taken something valuable from each of those relationships. Even the ones that were less than favorable influences on me. Each and everyone of those people had some idea of how they want to be remembered.

Some want to be remembered for being fun-loving and well-liked. Some go through life craving a sort of worship and hope that people will talk to a picture of them after they're gone. Some very godly people I've known just want to die knowing they have reached lost people. Others want to be mentors and apostles. And some people probably don't really care how they're remembered.

As for me... I've given this considerable thought and I think that I could, whether tomorrow or years down the road, pass on satisfied if someone could stand at my funeral and say that I loved them at a time when they didn't feel lovable, if I brought them a sense of calm and peace when their life was going to hell. Maybe that allowed them to see Christ when they needed to experience His hope and comfort the most.

You know, after re-reading that, I think I better get busy.

Death Journal

On Sunday morning, Padre Johnson challenged us to contemplate death. Specifically, our own death. It wasn't really a challenge, I guess, just something he mentioned in passing with the point that if we've never thought much about death, we might want to. Well, okie dokie.

Actually, I thought it was a strange idea but it has stuck in my head so I've been giving it some thought. He probably meant death as in eternity, heaven/hell, death or life, but I've taken a different approach.

Imagine that.

I've been taken with the idea of what would it be like if my death were expected sooner rather than later. How would things be if, suddenly, my death was a certainty? Yes, I know it is certain but I mean like before the rest of you go in the impending apocalypse of 2012.

For instance, a lot of people dwell on the question of what people will say about them in the future. I recall a comment from Dolly Parton (of all people) when she was asked what she wanted people to say about her in 100 years. She replied, "I hope they say she looks good for her age." It's funny to me how some use humor to be evasive about an obviously uncomfortable subject.

The thought of death is much more ominous and disturbing today than it used to be. Life used to be hard. Even the well-to-do of centuries past weren't guaranteed a long, happy life. In fact, the philosophy of "pursuit of happiness" was a completely unheard of concept until Thomas Jefferson wrote it in the Declaration of Independence. Therefore, people didn't dread the thought of passing on into paradise, they embraced it with anticipation. But today, we do indeed live the good life. Exceptional medicines, scientifically enhanced foods, bio-friendly emissions, and physically un-stressful occupations have all helped to extend the years of life. And that's just fine for most of us. Live long and live happy, push death off as long as you can.

So, back to me. I've been wondering, "What would my immediate circle be like if I found out that I wouldn't last the year? How would my friends around me react?"

Ryan might say, "Can I have your TV?"

Juli would most likely say, "This is because of your tobacco use, isn't it? I told you it would catch up with you!"

Isaac would say, "Bye bye, Chutsie!"

Sarah would wonder where she would go for cookies. Spenser would probably say, "Hang on a minute while I check the scores."

And Virginia would most definitely say, "Yeah, I know. I overheard you tell someone else."

And on and on it goes. Of course, I'm having a laugh at the expense of others but that's just what I do. I actually have many other, more serious thoughts on the subject but that will take other posts. It's interesting to think about. You should try it.

Encouragement! Yes!

"I will transfer you my energy, I will transfer you my karma. Here is my karma... on you."

Weird day. Heck, weird week. My body is at work while my mind is still on vacation, 400 miles away. The effects of that have played out very strangely.

80's music. Yes, you read that correctly. I've fallen into a phase where I am nuts for the music of my youth. Maybe that's normal in some universes, but not in mine.

Not just any music from my middle school years will do. No Ah-Ha, no Bangles, no Flock of Seagulls, no Bananarama. If those titles confuse you, then you were born after I entered high school. I've been listening to the good stuff. And it amazes me just how good it was.

Seriously, when you think of the 80's, you probably giggle a little. It was definitely excessive, materialistic, over the top fashion statements and all, but the music was amazing. I mean that from an artistic perspective, not from Casey Kasem's top 40 list. Sure there was the fluff, but some of it was just mind-blowingly good.

I have decided that every wannabe bass player and drummer should be forced to learn this song from Journey. I think I have a shirt like Steve Perry's in my closet.

Probably my favorite, for pretty much every reason, is this one. Songs today just aren't arranged like that. Anyone who considers songwriting or composing should listen to this long and hard, and then reconsider their choice of profession.

Well, that's my little trip down memory lane. Might be Alzheimer's setting in. That would explain why this post went from Salvador's yoga to Toto in about three sentences.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go trim the plushtache.

The word of the day is "stingray".

These little buggers are everywhere! I think they must travel in packs. These two are about two feet across. I looked down and there they were, swimming three yards away from me. Very graceful, they are, but when you're not expecting to see anything moving, it's quite a surprise. I took this picture after I landed.

Lots of jellyfish, too, but that's normal. According to the wildlife people down here, our party is trying to single-handedly destroy a colony of loggerhead sea turtles. We left our house lights on and that supposedly confuses the young turtles and they head inland after hatching instead of out to sea. I say it's bad parenting.

"Don't go chasin' waterfalls..."

"...stick me in de ocean, I'ma make it look real good." You'll need to see Couples Retreat for that to make sense but it never fails to crack me up. Needless to say, we've been reciting it over and over since we got here.

The sky was cloudless all day. Literally cloudless. And it was hot. This explains why I look like a tomato. No exaggeration. No embellishment. I could reach most of the way around my back to put on sunscreen. MOST being the key word there. I have a line on each side dividing SPF 8 from SPF nothing. The nothing-covered parts show the worst sunburn I've ever had, and I've had some doozies.

Near dusk, some black clouds moved in and gave us a lightning show that was absolutely amazing. Lightning is not easy to photograph. It took me about thirty-seven tries just to catch the glimpse in the photo below. But it was worth it.

Up close, it looks like the lightning is miles above the clouds, which it may be but still it adds depth to the picture. I have no idea what it looked like when God wrote the Ten Commandments for Moses but that's what came to mind when I saw this picture.

And finally, I am rockin' the Swagger Wagon. My room is a mile and a half away from everyone else so I'm taking the Thomas Greyhound back and forth each day. You have to watch this video, though, even if you've already seen it.

Day two comes to a painful close. Need help! Send aloe!

I have arrived.

It's amazing to me how one's mood instantly improves when you step out of the car and this is the first thing you see. Weeks, maybe months of stress and frustration faded quickly and my mind was filled with nothing but images of myself napping for hours at a time. Oh, and eating for hours at a time, too.

I've yet to step foot on the sand because we got here late afternoon and had to check in, unpack, freshen up, blah, blah, blah. So tomorrow can't get here fast enough as far as I'm concerned. Mostly sunny, 85 degrees. Jealous much???

Finally, I did something today that I've never done. I bought sunscreen. I think I've used it maybe twice in my life. My philosophy has always been burn and turn. Since I spend my days out in the sun, I tan early in the season and never really give thought to wearing sunscreen. But age breeds wisdom, I guess, so I've committed to wearing it this trip in order to somewhat protect the un-sunned parts that will be exposed. At least as much protection as SPF 8 will give. Anything higher than that and I might as well wear a hoodie.

That's all for day one. Have a great Sunday.

As much as depends on you...

We talked about Romans 12:18 tonight in our lesson and it really took me back to a specific day years ago. Consider this storytime.

I think I was in high school and was having an issue with relationships or a friendship or something. I don't really remember the details of why I was having troubles but that's not really important. But I do remember talking to my granddad about it. He told me that, "the Bible says to do your part to get along with everyone." Then he pointed me to that passage. It stuck with me instantly.

Years later, I came to SCBC and was on a youth trip to, wait for it... the Rocky Top Motor Lodge. Those of you who attended one of those trips can reminisce with me fondly. Anyway, during that trip, our youth girls were having some "issues" with each other. Some of you ladies might remember this. It makes me laugh still.

They were all piled in one of the rooms duking it out or crying together or whatever it is gals do when they powwow like that. Afterwards, gangly, adolescent Sarah and round-faced, adolescent Virginia came up to me and asked me, "What are you supposed to do when people won't let you get along with them?"

POW! Granddad memory resurfaced and I dropped that little tidbit of wisdom on them. I told them that God expects them to do their part and that's all they can do. You can't make people choose to do the right thing but you can choose to do your part. They looked at me with wide-eyed amazement (they haven't since), and I walked away thankful for how my granddad realized the importance of God's Word in everyday life application.

I'll never forget either of those memories. That's just a fraction of some of the things my grandfather taught me but it's real life proof that Scripture is the answer to life's struggles. Sorry, ladies, for embarrassing you. I'm sure a future dinner and ice cream will make up for it.

I have finally identified my wounds that I don't have.

I got to be a guinea pig of sorts tonight. I was asked to pour forth from myself for the benefit of a certain lovely college student's higher education. So I opened up the coffers of emotion and regret with the hopes that, someday, lovely college student's career will bless the lives of many a troubled soul.

I took this seriously from the start even though she tried to play it off as just an assignment. We began with the topic of "choose a personal issue." Not too difficult for someone with layer upon layer of personal issues. But choosing was harder than I imagined because there are somethings that are just hard to say. Nevertheless, we persevered.

I won't get into details but I quickly learned that there are things buried in us that we don't think are problems. During this little exercise, with eavesdropping lovely college student #2 listening in, I found myself dredging up some stuff that I had allowed to make decisions for me. Big decisions throughout my life that have altered my course. But what I have realized is this:

My choices have taken me to and from places, to and from relationships, and to and from God over and over again. Those choices are mine. No one else is responsible for them. I can only look to myself as the one to blame when the choice was wrong. Some choices had instant consequences while others took time, even years, to play out. And people were hurt, and continue to be hurt, by my choices. Summary: when I choose me, me wins. But only me.

I was taught years ago by my grandfather that Jesus was and is Love because He chose. He chose others. Always. First. With no regard for Himself, even to death. Philippians 2 puts it quite nicely. That's where Granddad pointed me to.

How to resolve my past? How to lay to rest the bad decisions of a lifetime? I can't go back, sadly, and make restitution. What I can do is what God has expected of me all along. That is to strive to be like Him. To choose others first, over and above myself.

Scars happen. But a scar is a healed wound, marked forever as a reminder of a bad choice. When I see the scar on my right wrist, I remember to not run headlong, arm extended into a glass door. When I see my inner scars, I remember to not make the decisions that led to those wounds.

I have decided that regrets are not a bad thing at all. They are reminders, lasting memorials to decisions that were most likely selfish and etched out in me to guide me away from making the same, bad choice again.

This probably doesn't make much sense to any of you but it's a great way to spend an evening with friends. I appreciate lovely college student's interest in my life, and #2's willingness to relate.

Oops, I did it again.

I've picked this up in the middle but you'll catch on.

We believe that if we carelessly screw up, we can say a quick prayer and apology, and the mistake will be chalked up to our humanness. It never dawns on us that the mistake might re-define Christianity to someone who is observing.

It might just incorrectly re-define Jesus.

It is for this very reason that we (as a church community) are mostly talk and very little fruit. We say whatever we feel impassioned about, but we only do what we feel like doing at any given moment. We are not meticulous and careful in our faith because we have become the religion of the do-over.

We love that Jesus died for our sins and that His grace cancels out the Old Testament need for sacrifice. Those Old Testamenters -- WOW -- they really had to bend over backward to get right with God: sackcloth and ashes, burnt offerings, weeping and gnashing. I couldn't gnash even if I wanted to. If I did, my orthodontist would make me wear a retainer to bed. We thank God that Jesus made all of those spiritual gymnastics a moot point. Jesus died on the cross. He took the blame. His scars and blood and death replaced the need for mine. That's what grace is -- and we love, love, love grace.

Sadly, we also abuse it.

In an attempt to be a more free church --less bound up in legalism-- we have embraced grace so heartily that we have also eradicated responsibility. We cave to sin and temptation and desires and whims and preferences very easily, especially in the church, and we feel bad fleetingly. Then grace comes in and spanks guilt and we have a half hour of worship and feel awesome. But we don't do a whole lot of the dirty work to truly seek permanent healing -- to truly sprint away from sin with all of our might.

Daily sins, shortcomings, and afflictions are rampantly increasing in the modern church. Why? Because we are seeing grace as a coupon -- as a voucher that allows us to not worry about destructive actions leading to disastrous consequences. It is as if we believe that for everyone else sin leads to hell and death, but for us it leads to a scolding that is quickly forgotten. We act like sinful actions are a cakewalk because we are lucky enough to know about the grace discount.

What happened to the reverence? The heartbreak that is supposed to come from displeasing God?

The truth is, Christ's grace does cover us, but our sins speak lies upon lies to those who have not yet decided if Christ is worth following. To them our choice of what to do about grace may very well mean life or death.

Grace does not replace change. Grace enables change. It empowers it, makes the change worth it. --Mark Steele

I'm not a church basher. Most churches, I believe, have a sizable number of devout, Christ-like folks. But step back and take an honest look and it's not hard to see that Christians are drifting toward a belief system that makes the narrow way a lot wider, and easier to navigate. It seems that the popular line of thinking is to call one's self set apart without having to live and look, and actually be set apart.

"How many legs does a dog have if you call the tail a leg? Four. Calling a tail a leg doesn't make it a leg." --President Abraham Lincoln

"The philosophy of the school room in one generation will be the philosophy of government in the next." --President Abraham Lincoln

I'm reading this book, see...

Every now and then I go out on a limb and read something from an author I've never heard of. This particular book caught my attention one day but I passed over it until about three months later. I finally decided to read it when I couldn't find anything else that appealed to me.

Really, really glad I did.

I'm sure you can deduce the idea of the book from the cover. Yes, in some cases you can judge a book. This being one of those cases.

The key word in the subtitle is "following." If you ever have a chance to read this, you'll understand.

First of all, this is one of the most serious and most hilarious books I've ever read. The content is naturally nothing to laugh at because it pretty much slaps modern Christianity, modern Christians I should say, right across the lips. And that includes you and me. We are all reminded frequently to check ourselves and our motives behind what we do, but even still, we usually find a way to make everything we think and do sound holy and anointed. We never really get right down to the heart of the matter.

Read it for yourselves. But occasionally, you run across something that says in black and white exactly what that little nagging vibe you've been having could never voice. And you find yourself screaming out in agreement with what you've felt for a very long time. That's kinda how this book has hit me. You know that feeling -- you sense it deep down but you can't say anything because you keeping hearing that other voice that tells you you're just being silly and over-reacting. Well, it's a good feeling when you realize you're not the only crazy person.

Having said that, I am the world's biggest critic of revolutionizing one's thinking based on the opinions of an author. It's really easy in our Christian culture today to find a book that supports our latest whim. People do it all the time. Following the trends, we are all made to think we have to be purpose-driven, crazy lovin', God experiencing, (insert any Lucado title here) Christians or we're not really followers of Jesus. So I in no way plan on making this my new Bible. I just think the author has really nailed the very center of the church's problems today. Self, with a heavy dose of denial and self-deception.

Anyway, good book. Here's a teaser:

Some of the most significant damage done to the credibility of Jesus' message has been the slipshod approach of conveying it by many of His followers. Though there are a significant amount of Christ-followers who have shown excellence in their art and business, the percentages of crappy art and bad business justified with the name of Jesus are staggeringly high. We have made cheeseball films and abhorrent television, believing that an altar call at the end means it won't return void. We have produced derivative music for a dime, putting a capital "Y" on the "you" in a love song and calling it worship. We have made questionable (and oft illegal) financial decisions at the helm of ministries, defending the action by the evangelistic ends justifying the means. We have mistreated people standing in the way of our goal, berated people who disagreed with our goal, and stepped on good people to climb to our goal -- all in the name of Christ. Why? All because people keep trying to fit where God did not create them to fit. And Jesus is the one getting the black eye over it.

Oh, where to begin...

Well, the long, dark night is over. I'm speaking of the work project I was on. We had a four week deadline and finished up around 8 pm tonight in just under two and a half weeks, so everyone's happy for the moment. As of tonight, I have worked 175 hours in April. I feel every single minute of it.

But I learned some valuable things while on that crazy schedule. Our work location was the intersection of Broadway and Depot, just a block or so from KARM. My workmates and I were approached all day and night by the people, some homeless, some druggies, some who just had hard luck, who frequent the area. You wouldn't believe the things you can learn from them. And the things they will offer you for a single beer.

For instance, if you're in the market for a nice, hardly used lock-blade knife, I can introduce you to a guy. If you need a brand spanking new wrist watch, I have several contacts (after declining one offer, he asked me if I knew what time it was. Not even kidding). If it's sex you're after, well let's just say there are options, and I mean any variation you can think of and some you've probably never even heard of. If I were a smoker, I would be the most popular person in the neighborhood, based on the number of people who asked for a cigarette. I now know the complete daily schedule for the KAT buses, and I know Darryl, the guy who drives the city street sweeper truck, well enough to high-five him each night at 11:07 when he rolls by.

Life is truly like a box of chocolates.

Now, on to something more important and much more painful (for me). It's confession time again. I say again because it seems I do it a lot.

Some of you have had to listen to "someone" over the past couple of months rant and rave and rail about a certain new pastor who was hired at a certain church that a certain, as well as dashingly handsome, blogger attends. I, I mean "he", fussed and griped, complained and whined about everything from his salary to his haircut, or lack thereof.

What I'm getting at is that I've been a very poor example, unless the example you're looking for is that of "most divisive and strife-causing church member," in which case I'm awesome! I really have ran my mouth a lot about someone that I'd never even met, and all because of, well, I really don't know why. Maybe I'm just good at being a jerk.

But on Sunday morning, about five minutes into Rev. Johnson's sermon, I started feeling something. Not sure what it was, but it was something. So I began to pay close attention to the something as I listened to what the pastor had to say. It wasn't long before I found myself agreeing with his points. Then the something got really loud. And my face got really hot. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. My next thought was...

"Oh, great. Now I'm starting to like the guy."

No joking. Right there in my choir seat, I felt my heart and attitude flip-flop instantly toward our new pastor. So I hung on every word for the rest of the sermon and realized how much I liked his vision for our church and how much I agree with what he believes God wants to do here.

God. God is big. Huge. Powerful. And...gentle enough to turn a small, cold heart around without so much as breeze blowing. God is really something.

So I apologize to those of you who may have had to listen to my bad attitude. I have no excuse other than just naturally being a _______. You can choose your own word.

And I'm really, really glad that God doesn't let me make His decisions for Him.

Some things just make me smile.

On my way to work today, I saw my very, very, mostest favorite indicator of spring. I've been so busy lately that I almost forgot to notice them. I would love to have the opportunity to go out and photograph some of them but, alas, time will not allow. I am talking about the redbud tree.

I'm not sure when or where I developed my fascination with redbuds but I think it probably comes from my childhood. In the front yard of the house where I grew up, there was this big, full redbud that bloomed each year. I swear it looked electric to me. So now, every spring, I drive around and look at them. You can have your dogwoods and Bradford pears, just give me my vibrant, vivid, electric redbuds.

Truck-blogging

Yes, that's right. I'm posting from the cab of my truck. It's lunch time and I was taking the opportunity to prepare my lesson for Sunday morning. Time is limited so, as I once heard my granddad say, "Make hay while the sun shines."

As I was studying in 1 Corinthians, I read a verse that is one of those that you know you've read a million times but this is the one time it just blows you away. I won't belabor the Easter point so as to not take away from your celebration, but I will leave you with this one, short verse that screams "Hallelujah!" to me.

If in Christ we have hope in this life only, we are of all people most to be pitied. --1 Corinthians 15:19

Happy Easter, everyone.

Here's a glimpse into my one-dimensional life.

I realize that it is probably of little or no importance to you, but here are some pics from my little chunk of paradise. Above is my only view of the outside world. Lovely skylight, don't you think?

And here is my "office", so to speak. By the way, two of us use this space at the same time. We sit on those walk boards that you see. Not much leg room, hence the sore knees and hips.

And finally, this is a close-up of the world of a color-blind phone man. Don't ask me to explain it, but even with severe "ocular deficiencies", this makes perfect sense to me. Those of you who are astute will see a repeating sequence of 50 different colors. And, in case you want to count them, there are 4200 individual wires staring back at you.

Such is the isolated existence of yours truly; twelve hours a day of what you see above. Since Monday afternoon, I've actually spoken to only 5 different people, which puts my social interaction on roughly the same level as a home-schooled kid. Don't be too surprised if I run up and throw my arms around you the next time we meet. I mean, seriously, all I need is a volleyball with a hand-print for a face and a name.

However, I did get to see something very cool today. Under the bridge where all this work is taking place, several local ministries set up today to feed the homeless people in the area. I'm not sure how many volunteers they had but they had a huge number of folks taking part and I got to hear part of the sermon that some guy preached. Of course, it was difficult to make out from 15 feet underground.

Nonetheless, it was a pretty neat thing.

But praise God for the beautiful spring weather! I have the worst case of spring fever in history. It's gonna be a great summer.