It was fun, no doubt. I haven't been that close to an involuntarily bowel movement in years. I tried to be cool but I'm just not. Never will be.
But I learned a few things. First and foremost, Bennett is the man. He was terrified before we even got in line, but afterwards he was laughing. It wasn't easy for him and he had some difficult moments, but he kept walking, facing his fears, and emerged with his chest stuck out. Way to go.
Also, I realized my reaction to fear. I don't get scared often. Let me clarify that, I'm not fearless, I just don't find myself in very many situations that cause fear. But tonight I got spooked several times. What I noticed was that I don't scream (like Virginia), I don't freeze (like Virginia), I don't tear out someone's bicep (like Virginia), and I don't hide my face (like...yeah).
I get this little tingle from the small of my back up to my ears. It's that old chill of fear, I guess, but it's instant and all my senses go numb. There's no outward reaction except maybe a small jerk, but I zone out and my fists ball up. I don't think I ever had the urge to use them but they were ready. I'm sure Michael Myers was shaking in his coveralls.
I recalled the times I've felt this way before, most recently when I fell from a telephone pole. When I stepped up and there was nothing there, I remember feeling that same tingle right before I hit the ground.
Now, what struck me tonight was that I have felt that same tingle at times when there was no apparent danger; no scary-masked people, no chain-saws, and no fog-enshrouded cornfield. It was just me and my normal surroundings.
These times of fear were about people. Sometimes we see or hear things in the lives of those we love that scare us. Our spiritual radar starts humming and it's as if God is warning us that we need to alert for someone. I think the Holy Spirit tips us off at times to harmful things or situations that people are involved in so that we can be prepared, either in prayer, or in confrontation, or literally in a position of rescue.
I wish I had always been attuned to these feelings. I know of a few that I have responded to but I'm sure there were more and will be more. After all, that's partly what the church is for, to look out for each other when we don't see things clearly.
Anyway, just thinking out loud.
