It's a Creek thang

I promised Shelby and Hayley I would post this picture and they actually agreed to let me. I guess Stock Creek gals turn into truckstop gals every now and then. Yeah. Awkward.

I like to call this look Redneck/Thug.

WWJW pictures are up on my Flickr site. Click on the photo gallery or go to my photostream. I only uploaded about half of them. It takes forever.

I'm very smiley today. Maybe it's the weather. Warm and sunny makes me warm and fuzzy, I guess. But maybe it's something else.

I was thinking today about all the little busy things we have going on in our lives. Mainly the church things. There's a lot going on! JGen, Awkward, UGLY, Frequency, Live-Wire, N.O.W., Romania, lions, tigers, and bears. I can't even name them all. But there's also relationship maintenance, relationship development, accountability, and most importantly, just loving everybody. These things are important to us, they are practically our whole life. How important are they to God?

I think not very important at all. Weren't expecting to hear that, maybe? Don't like the sound of it? Great, big, all-loving God not caring?!?!? C'est impossible!!

But we are very important to Him. More important than anything. Our activities may be just what we do to stay involved with Him, but He loves us enough to involve Himself in our activities and our relationships because those are the things that keep our relationship with Him in focus. And that's what it's all about.

That's what God wants more than anything; to be in a constant state of communication and communion with us. So He intervenes in our daily lives and events, continually moving in us and around us, showing Himself to us and to others through us. It's not the things we do that matter, it's the reason we do them.

So we should occasionally stop and check ourselves and our motives. And we should always be aware that God desires us. He isn't too concerned with completing a checklist or giving out "Best New Idea of the Day" awards.

I guess there's no great point to make here. Just the way my mind was thinking today.

I Feel Like Crap. Or, "Storytime with Uncle Chucky"

Ugh. I now have what everyone else has had. Thanks a bunch. At noon today I felt fine. By 4 o'clock I felt like someone had whipped the you-know-what out of me with an I-don't-know-what. The kicker is that I was off all last week so I can't, in good conscience, take off tomorrow. I would appreciate a little shout-out for me in your prayer time. Wednesday could be long and taxing.

Enough whining. On with the story.

Howard M. Carver was my grandfather (the "M" stands for McDoyle, good thing they named me after his first name). He was a mathematical genius. Seriously. He good do long calculations in his head and on paper that I still can't do on a computer. It was amazing, people.

Grandad worked for around forty years at Robertshaw-Fulton as a shop foreman. R-F was the big white factory on Cumberland, on the left just before you go under Alcoa Hwy. They tore it down last year. He was well-liked and I still get people who, upon hearing my last name, ask if I'm "kin to Haird." Doug Hayes is one of these people. He worked with G-dad years ago.

I think he was so good at math because he was responsible for keeping the books in his department in the days before calculators and computers. All you accountants and numbers-crunchers imagine doing your jobs that way. You'd slit your wrists after half a day.

When I was in school, many moons ago, I would ask Grandad for help with math. I did, and still do, suck at math. I remember one time he was helping me with long division. I was just learning it and it was tough, man.

I had worked a problem on paper that was about twenty-four lines long and, yeah, you guessed it. Wrong answer. I was crushed because I felt completely stupid and was dreading re-doing the problem. I will never forget what Grandad said, even though at the time it fell on deaf ears.

"When you get down there and where your at is wrong, just back-track a little to the place it was last right and start from there. "

Jesus met his disciples at the Sea of Galilee. Right where He found them to begin with. Possibly, they had decided that their time as disciples had ended with Jesus' death and now they were just going to live out the retired life doing what they did best. But when they reach the shore and sit down to eat with Jesus, He approaches Peter and gives him the opportunity of a lifetime. Peter gets three chances to profess his love for the Lord, just like he had three chances to deny his love for the Lord. John Ortberg writes about how the fire is specifically noted as a charcoal fire, just like when Peter denied Christ around the fire-barrel. It must have really reminded Peter of that night when he turned his back on Jesus. But this time, Peter is back where he needs to be. He is where he can be found. Square one.

The result is that Jesus gives Peter his misson, his calling. Peter went back to where it began and came out with a new life.

Sometimes we just need to back up to where we were last right with God and start from there. Restoration for Jonah began in the fish when it was just him and God. The Bible says that after three days Jonah prayed. What went on for three days in a fish's gut? Fish burps and God-talk. Jonah had time to get back to God. He was a prophet, and needed to be reminded of it. I would wager that a fair amount of internal speaking and listening went on in that fish.

When Prof. Dr. Rev. Cross was talking about this, and his own personal story, Friday night, I, of course, was thinking about my own "life-crash." My last year or so has been one of demolition and restoration. It took me a while to understand that where I needed to take myself was the place where my life was last in tune with God. And God met me there. He is now more real to me than ever before, He now has more of me than ever before, and His voice is clearer to me than ever before. Like Peter and Jonah, and countless others, I got my mission from the Lord when my own mission was stripped away. One word: Hallelujah.

Thanks to Senator Cross for the inspiration. Thanks to Grandad for the life lesson. Actually, he's in Heaven and couldn't care less about what's going on with me because he gets to look at Jesus all day. I'm okay with that.

No preaching tonight...

...because it's late and I'm tired. I just got home, just got a shower, just fixed a burger (I call it the "Big Chuck"), and it's almost midnight. So I have just a few random things to mention.

1) Heather, Sarah and Virginia, this is Fire Marshal Bill. So when I walk around with my upper lip tucked in, as in the photo above, you'll understand. Proceed with your old man jokes as you will, I can take it.

2) A few of you good, lovely people gave me a much needed and much appreciated gift today. Thank you. It's not even my birthday! That happens next week, by the way. I'll be 25.

3) I really do thank God for this past weekend. I know it was more for the kids than me but what a great God He is to speak to all of us there, even the leaders. Specifically, I thank Him for:

• showing me some things in my heart


• changing some things in my heart


• and confirming some things in my heart

4) How, in Heaven's name, did I come away from this trip with the nickname "Kitty?" It's beyond me.

5) As soon as I get a few hours to spare, I'll upload the pics from WWJW to my Flickr site. Hopefully tomorrow night.

6) And finally, God continues to teach me about the many different faces of love. How it comes from Him, reflects Him, brings glory to Him, and endures (long-suffers for you KJV-er's) like Him.

Being real is about expressing love. It's about being the person God wants me to be and living in response to His love and the love He wants me to share. So my attitude toward certain things has changed. Most importantly, no more free passes. I've always been one to turn a deaf ear and a blind eye because I didn't want to anger someone or endanger a friendship. That's not being a very good friend. I am not willing to overlook certain issues anymore because love demands that those we love be where they need to be with God. So, in the future, I'm going to try to be more honest with people and be a better compass. It's not because of selfishness or control, personal desires or motives. It's because of love. I hope you will do the same for me when I need it.

I'm going to bed now. If I can stop watching Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. It's on television right now. You'd think I haven't seen it four dozen times.

First thing

Obviously, there will be much to say about this weekend and the things God spoke to us. Thanks to Benji for great worship and leading us into an awesome time of reflection and opening up, and basically just for loving his youth group and his leadership. Thanks to Dave for being open to what God wanted him to say and for being a willing mouthpiece. And thanks to Mike and Teresa for organizing the trip and being willing servants the whole time.

But before I delve into the heart of the weekend (future posts, possibly), I have to mention the big burden I came away with this weekend. And let me say that I am the "chief of sinners" on this one.

We have to start treating each other the same. We are a great and loving family but sometimes we have fun at the expense of others. I only have to say "bingo" and "personal space" for all of you to know what I'm talking about. Please don't think I'm fussing, I'm only sharing something that God has hit me with.

I saw all weekend long how we love our inside jokes. I do, too. It's a family, clique-ish, bonding thing. It gives us something to talk about when we want to have a little fun. Nothing wrong with fun. But if we go to extremes to have it, then it's time to back off and take a little introspective time.

What if we really started appreciating a touchy-feely person instead of acting like they have the plague? The truth is there is no inappropriate motivation behind their actions. I can say that with 100% confidence. Their ways are just different. The person I'm referring to actually loves us more than we love each other and would go to any lengths necessary just to make sure we are comfortable and happy. We are much more touchy-feely with each other than this person has ever been, we just limit our disgust to anyone outside the circle of "cool and well-liked" people. Real mature, huh? And we probably do it just to distract from our own insecurities about physical contact with people. That's not the Jesus kind of love and it's nowhere close to real family. I apologize for my part in this, and it's been a big part.

If any of us would be real about it, we would have to admit that we don't love on the scale that this person does. The tough question is, we should, but do we want to?

And what about the different ones? The special ones who have quirky personalities and less-than-acceptable social skills? Is it really a big deal if someone we are around five times a week closes in on us and makes us feel uncomfortable? She's just trying to be a part of the group, the group that we have made exclusive to only the ones we deem acceptable. Maybe if we opened up to the ones we have made outcasts, they would be more comfortable around us, thus making us more comfortable around them. Life hasn't been as smooth and easy for everyone like it has been for some of us. Maybe we should show our thanks to God by helping to put some joy into the life of someone who needs some. The truth is, she loves nothing more than coming to church and hanging with all of us. And all we do is duck and dodge, and crack jokes behind her back. That's not exactly "doing to the least of these." (see Matthew 25:42-45)

It's not love if it's selective. That's how the world loves and we want no part of that.

God wants something more from us. The words God spoke to us this weekend should have us all stopping to consider our spiritual state and how well we show Him to the world. But if our own family, the ones we worship and pray with, the ones we teach and learn from, if they can't see Jesus' love in us, then the world won't see it.

If you've made it this far and don't hate me, let me assure you that I'm the first and greatest offender in both of these situations. I have preached love on this blog more times than I can count. I have tried to be good to, and for, each of you because I care deeply about you. I've busted my rear-end and lost days and weeks of sleep struggling with God about how to restore broken relationships with you. But I haven't loved the others that Jesus has blessed my life with. I've been selective in who I choose to love. That's wrong, y'all.

So I am sorry for the way I've acted. There is no excuse for it. I sincerely apologize and ask your forgiveness for leading you by example into these actions and, frankly, this sin. We will never be all that God wants us to be if we call ourselves something that we're not.

Maybe you're not a guilty party in this. That's great. But please take some time and talk to God about it. Put it before Him and ask Him how He feels about it. This weekend was about being real. That's actually just a synonym for being Christ-like.

I love you all. If you want to talk more about this or if I've made you mad and you want to blast me, you can call me.

I hope you have a great week.

From Disciple Now to Right Now

It's been five weeks or so since D-Now. Wow! What a difference a few weeks can make. Our student ministry is in a place it's never been before and the possibilities are unlimited. I'm reminded of something Heather posted on January 20th:

"D-Now was not our last chance, our greatest accomplishment. It was our first."

Disciple Now was great, no doubt about it. But it was just the start, sort of a trial run of things to come. Since then our group has grown tighter, has taken their walk with God up a notch (or two), and is hungry for more. The really cool thing is that it's not just the adults, JGenners, or high-schoolers. This pursuit of God has overtaken us all.

I could tell countless stories from the past month of how God has moved in lives, changed hearts, and spoken to people. I feel that the Walk With Jesus Weekend will yield even more fruit. Just as we felt with D-Now, something great is coming.

I don't want to get all mystical and spooky with this. The truth is, what's coming is just another level of what has come. It's another step in the process of what God wants to do. D-Now was the first, and this is the second, or third or fourth depending on how you keep score. What's important is that it is part of God's on-going work in us and around us.

Disciple Now was the awakening to how badly we needed something more. The Weekend Walk might just be the something more.

So here's my prayer for the weekend: I pray that every heart is open, truly open to God and what He wants to say to it. I pray that we come with no expectations of what He wants to do, but simply with the expectation that He will do as He pleases, and we will choose to let Him have His way. And, I pray that we come away from the weekend changed; knowing Him more, seeking Him more, surrendered to Him more, and loving Him more.

It's gonna be a great, fun time. I love you all and I'll see you there.

Sometimes you just can't think of a good title

First of all, thanks to Sarah and Spenser for a fun visit Tuesday night. It's always good to hang out and play SkipBo, which I won hands down.

Next, I'm convinced Benji Fowler can make anything in life into a spiritual message. Even Jenga.

The scripture reference tonight was Colossians 3:12,13:

Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.

I don't know about you but I think this passage is about as plain as it gets. There's really no gray area. As Benji said, there are no prerequisites to forgiveness. It is given, not earned. But here is how it relates to the topic of the night.

The virtues listed above are desired in our friends. We look for these, and other things, in the people we choose to be around. The "perfect friend" would show these characteristics pretty much all the time. But we find these only in Christ. Likewise, we can only exhibit these things if we are found in Christ. And just as important as finding these in others is putting them on ourselves for the sake of others. So, it kinda comes down to what kind of friend we are to others, and are we the kind of friend we look for.

I treasure my friends. I feel as though no one has ever been blessed with good, Christian friends like I have. But, wonderful as they are, they don't always look like the kind of person Paul describes here. I'm sure I rarely look that way to them at all. But friends are friends. And true friends are always friends. I know the people who are truthful with me, who I can count on to be there, to lift me up and bear my burdens. They are the ones who share my love for God.

And so it comes down to love. Paul goes on to write, in the next verse:

And above all these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony.

Love is the foundation. Love binds all these other virtues together, love binds hearts together. There is no substitute for it, there is nothing that can compensate for its absence, and there is nothing that can motivate us like love.

I think what Paul was trying to get this church to understand is that it is up to those of us who have accepted God's love to join together and be an earthly picture of that love. "Birds of a feather" and stuff. We have to start "flocking together" and reaching out to each other. We have to start loving each other, keeping each other close, reeling each other back in when we drift. Because that's what we do. We support, we encourage, we understand, we comfort, we bear. We walk, crawl, tip-toe, run, jump, hop, or skip through the fire with each other so that we can stand with each other on the other side.

We love. Because we are loved.

Happy Thursday.

It ain't easy bein' me

For all of you who take pleasure in poking fun at my less than perfect eyesight, here is the view from my world. In the six circles of this little test, I see the number 25 in the top left circle. Everything else is just vomit to me. I don't know the proper diagnosis for this condition, but I do know that makes me severely color-blind. Yeah, I'm a blast at traffic lights.

This is why I don't go shopping alone. Thanks to Ryan and Juli, and others who have generously given of their time to help me NOT look like an idiot in public; at least no more of an idiot than is natural.

If you've ever seen the inside of a telephone cable, then you are amazed right now that I even have a job. Phone cables are divided by colors. Actually, ten pairs of colors that are recurring depending on the size of the cable. The colors are blue-orange-green-brown-slate, and white-red-black-yellow-violet. They are divided by binders.

Here's how a 100 pair cable would count:
Pairs: 1-25 - blue/white binder
Pairs 26-50 - orange/white binder
Pairs 51-75 - green/white binder
Pairs 76-100 - brown/white binder

The individual pairs count 1-5, 6-10, 11-15, 16-20, and 21-25. Their corresponding colors are blue/white, orange/white, green/white, brown/white, and slate/white for 1-5. 6-10 would be blue/red, orange/red, green/red, brown/red, and slate/red. You get the picture, all the colors repeat (tip side/ring side) and only the ring and binder color changes. It's not really complicated as evidenced by my understanding of it. But it can get frustrating when the cable size is 2400 pairs instead of 100.

It is especially frustrating for someone with eyes like mine.

Obviously, you probably don't care any more about phone work than I do. It's not exactly my passion. But I do have a point to make. In nine years of placing and splicing these cables, not one splice that I have made has ever been turned back as defective. That means that, even with severe color-blindness, I have somehow managed to get every single pair in the right place, and in the right order. I can't pick out matching clothes but I can splice little, tiny, colored wires. I have overcome a severe handicap to perform my job. And that has to be the work of God.

We are all called to do certain "jobs" for God. With those duties come handicaps that stand in the way of us being effective for God's causes. Moses had a speech impediment, for example. But just as Moses' handicap was overcome, God will also give us ways to overcome our deficiencies. Some people don't like to speak in public, some don't like to pray out loud, and some don't like be seen at all. God is big enough to get us past all those things. He won't lead us to do something without equipping us for the task.

Remember the words Paul heard from God, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." That is still true today for all of us.

His righteousness is made perfect in our un-righteousness; His humility in our pride, and His love in our in-ability to love apart from Him.

Okay, I'm on vacation so there will be no more shop-talk from me this week.

I hope everyone has a good day tomorrow. (At work! Ha!)

Odds and ends

Just a few random things from my weekend.

I went hiking with some of the youth yesterday and it was a blast. The weather was warm and sunny, but there was still ice all over the falls.

The kids, myself included, climbed all over the rocks and ended up about half of a mile downstream. Which, of course, meant that we had to hike back upstream to get back to the trail.

What a great bunch of people in our student ministry, students and leaders alike. There really is no shortage of love in the J3Gen group.

Friday night was really cool. We did an exercise to get ourselves thinking about how well we love. In short, we wrote our names down and put them in the shoeboxes of those people that we know love us. It was very eye-opening to find out just who feels loved by us. The exercise has already borne fruit in some conversations and I look forward to hearing more on it in the near future.

The Walk with Jesus Weekend is coming up and will be awesome. There is a big crowd going and we all look forward to hearing world-renowned speaker Dave Cross bring the word. Pray that God falls on us all and changes hearts this weekend.

Finally, I saw this video today and cracked up. It's about a Starbuck's Church. I send it out to someone (you know who you are) that would love to join this church and would probably be sitting on the front row every Sunday.

I will now gloat just a bit. I'm off work all week. Just some time to relax and recharge. I have no plans other than a trip to see Spenarah on Tuesday. If I can do anything for any of you this week, consider me available. I'm easy to reach.

Have a great Monday.

It's the little things

I usually take Wednesday nights and expound on what Benji preached about but tonight will be different. His sermon was great, pretty self-explanatory and truthful, as always, but I've got something else on my mind.

Today at work the morning was cold and rainy. Miserable working conditions by my standards. But just before lunch, the rain stopped and a warm breeze started blowing. I mean, the air temperature changed instantly. One second the air was cold and the next it felt like spring. I felt my mood change with it. I started thinking about those simple pleasures, like a warm breeze, that put a smile on my face.

Be warned...after reading this you may know more about me than you want to.

Here are a few things on my list, in no certain order:

Freshly laundered bed sheets -- Nothing beats crawling into bed, especially on a cold night, to clean, tight sheets. You have to cram your toes down into the end where they are still a little warm, and tug on them a bit to get them high enough.

Mountain Dew and Fudge Rounds -- Two words: yummy, yummy!

A new toothbrush -- I bought one the other day and it has restored the fun to brushing. Maybe it's because it's new or maybe because it's bristled differently, no matter, I love it 'cause it feels so good.

Toilet paper, the good kind -- Not the nearly-sheer, poke-through kind but thick and quilted. I once heard it said that men demand name-brand quality in only two things, power tools and toilet paper. I would concur.

Potted meat -- The poor man's caviar. I know there are noses turning upward right now but with the Obama administration settling in, four cans for a dollar will push this stuff to T-Bone status.

A good book -- No explanation needed. Few things compare with getting lost in a different world and never having to leave your recliner.

Skits -- The dramas we are doing at church right now are cheesy and corny, but they are fun to do. I think the big draw for me is knowing that months or years down the road, I will be able to walk up to Heather or Virginia or Cody, or whoever, and say, "Remember when we did..." That's cool to me.

Friends, the real kind -- the kind we only have a handful of in life. Benji hit on this tonight. These friends are the ones you can lean on, the ones who can lean on you, the ones you work through the tough issues with, the ones that have to be in your life because you just can't see life any other way, and the ones that inspire you to grow in God.

That's my short list of life's simple pleasures. I realize that these are based on individual tastes, but that's okay, I forgive you for being weird.

Perhaps the greatest and simplest pleasure is simply...love. Love really is a simple thing. Paul defined it perfectly in 1 Corinthians 13. Our imperfect humanity and selfishness are what complicate it.

But I am afraid that, as the serpent deceived Eve by his craftiness, your minds will be led astray from the simplicity and purity of devotion to Christ. --2 Corinthians 11:3

Huh. Devotion to Christ is simple? Doesn't seem like it most of the time, does it? But according to the Bible, yeah, it is. I guess our minds are led astray more often than we think. Believe Him, surrender to Him, follow Him. Pretty simple.

Maybe we get too caught up in the complexity of God, the mystery of the Trinity, and His unfathomable ways. Maybe our desire to control everything leads us to focus on the things we can't figure out when all He asks is for us to simply let Him take control. Maybe if we turn our lives over to Him, once and for all, our needless cares would fall away, the dark clouds over us would part, and His peace would wash over us like the warm breeze that inspired this rant. Now that's simple.

And, as always, I do love simplicity.

The long, hard road back

I watched this skit called "Everything" by Lifehouse, then I watched it again. If you haven't linked to it from the "Skittles" post on Blessed, you should do so now.

I want to ponder a certain part of the skit but I won't give you the time marker because I want you to watch the whole thing. It really is a powerfully emotional message.

At one point, the main character drifts away, is pulled away, is distracted from God, whichever fits your mindset. After a moment of awareness she realizes what she has become and looks to Jesus for rescue. But there is a problem. Those distractions, sins, stand between her and Jesus. She reaches for Him, calls out to Him, even begs and fights to return, but the things she has invited into her life just fight back.

It doesn't take much for us to leave God behind. Desires, temptations, our own self-righteousness are just a few things that open a chasm between ourselves and God. But when we allow those things into our lives, they take hold. It only takes a moment, one decision, one wrong choice, to set ourselves on a path that takes us away from our walk with God. But the road to repentance and restoration is long and hard. It's a rough road back.

Those choices that seem so wonderful and right at the time will eventually reveal themselves to be destructive. The Bible says, "...even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light." (2 Corinthians 11:14) Just as he has done since the dawn of man, Satan uses things that we interpret as blessings to turn us away from God. This is why it is so important to stay in the Word, to abide in Him. Our spiritual eyes can see these things, but they have to be focused on God.

I'm reminded of the kudzu vine. You can plant one small root in minutes, but getting rid of the stuff is nearly impossible. It's the same with sin.

To bring this around to a positive note, the end of the skit shows Jesus seeing and hearing her cries for deliverance. Her repentant heart allows Him to intercede. And it's an amazing thing to see Him jump in and cast away the things that had come between them. He shields her from the evil things and the video ends with their relationship restored. Amen.

God isn't going to let us go. But why should we use that as an excuse to follow our own lead? We go about walking our own path, then call on Him to bail us out when it turns out to be a dead-end. Better to stay on His path from the start.

Have a great day.

Storm story

I apologize if I sound like a Weather Channel correspondent but the storm last night gave me a perspective to share. I would have posted this last night, but by the time my electricity was restored, I was well into Dreamland.

I left work yesterday and drove straight to Farragut. The sky was barely even cloudy in South Knoxville at the time. I was on Pellissippi Parkway at Northshore Drive when it started raining just a bit. When I got to Westland Drive, the situation became grave. I hit a wall of water, literally. It was like I drove off into the lake. Instantly, I couldn't even see the front-end of my truck. And that's no exaggeration. I slowed rather rapidly and pulled over to the shoulder; I think it was the shoulder, it was somewhere to the right of my previous location.

I sat there for only about three minutes then proceeded. By the time I got to Smith Road and Kingston Pike, everything had passed and the weather was normal, just a light shower. But, philosopher that I am, I started thinking about life. Spenser, life is like a category 4 hurricane.

Sometimes we cruise along, all conditions normal, or at least what we think is normal. But it might just be our own personal definition of normal. It may be what we have convinced ourselves is normal. We see no danger or changing conditions on the horizon, just the same normal that we enjoy, and protect. We tell ourselves that we are okay, that we are right where we should be. No worries, we have all the answers, and the skies (future) are cloudless and bright.

Then, darkness. No sight, no vision, no equilibrium, just the storm. Life has instantly been transformed from paradise to hell. Everything we thought we knew has become BS, everything we held confidence in has crumbled, and life is forever different. We look for stability, something of the joy of the past to hold on to, but nothing remains. Nothing, that is, but God. The same God who allowed, or created, the storm.

I don't want to sound like an old geezer (no jokes, please), but I have experienced this more than once in my life. Sometimes because of my decisions and sometimes because of other people's decisions. If you think I'm overstating the suddenness and impact of such an event, I hope you are never proven wrong. Or maybe I hope you are.

The gut-wrenching part is that sometimes the storms foretell their arrival. There are signs, forecasts to warn us of a coming change. If we would pay attention to the forecasts we could change our direction and avoid the bad weather. If we kept our eyes focused above, we might just see the trouble ahead and take steps to prepare. We would have time to seek shelter.

God wants our attention. He wants to grow us closer to Him. He wants to prepare us for the future He has planned out for us. Sometimes that requires drastic measures to get our attention. But the storms we go through for Him are designed to slow us down, focus our attention on Him, make us dependent on Him, and then set us back on the path after having strengthened us.

Life, even the good life, can change in an instant. But the life that is truly good is only found in obedience to God. There is no compromise. And there is no faking it.

I don't usually like the storms because I have to work in them and they usually increase my workload. But when the next one comes along, I'm going to slow down and see God in it. Not just in the storm's fury, but in the bright, clean world it leaves behind.

Have a great Friday, everyone.

Hangin' in the 'Burg

I took a little trip tonight with a few friends. Above would be Virginia, Sarah, Hayley (on the bean-bags), Spenser (on the laptop), and The Don just behind Spenser. We had a freakin' blast. More pics here.

But even though this was a just for fun trip to see S & S, I couldn't help but think of the lengths we sometimes go to just to love people. Williamsburg is barely over an hour away, not far, but when the weekdays drag on and your loved ones are somewhere out of reach, distance doesn't matter much. Sometimes you just miss people enough to plan a road trip.

Virginia texted me last week with the idea of driving up to see Spenarah so we secretly planned a group outing to surprise them. They thought it would just be me. I wish you could have seen their faces as they ran across the road and threw open the truck doors. Sarah actually looked scared for a minute.

Anyway, it was alot of fun. I thank God for those two and what it means to me to see them live out their lives for God. This blooming JGen family is something truly unique and the bonds just keep growing stronger. Thanks to Sunny D, Mean Train and Nerdy Hayley for being good co-pilots. Anyone who can put up with an hour of grape belches is a real trooper. That's gotta be a family thing.

He's back!!!

This is Herschel. He started hanging around my house about a year and a half ago. I've never fed him but I guess he just likes the neighborhood.

For a long time I called him Pigwidgeon. I thought he was a girl. When I found out otherwise (his plumage gave it away) I found a name with more masculinity.

He hasn't been around for a while and I thought something had happened to him. But today he returned.

Welcome back, buddy.

This will be my only mention of St. Valentine's Day

Or as I like to call it, St. I'm ignoring it day. But, nonetheless, it is the day that has been set aside for the celebration of wuv and love is a good thing.

Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and whoever loves has been born of God and knows God. Anyone who does not love does not know God, because God is love. In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent His only Son into the world, so that we might live through Him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we ought also to love one another. --1 John 4:7-11

God is the source of love. That's pretty plain-and-simple, I think. His love has declared itself to us in our creation, but among us in our redemption. And Jesus tells us that our pattern to follow in loving is the one He set before us:

Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. --John 15:13

My Sunday night guys and I had an interesting discussion on this verse. Bear in mind these are middle and high school boys. They were intrigued by the notion that it's not just the laying down of our physical lives that shows this greatest love, but laying down our lives for someone on a daily basis, taking on their burdens, devoting ourselves to meeting their needs, listening, helping, encouraging, and giving. In short, give all you can, then give more.

This is sacrificial love. This is Christ's love. And honestly, it's the only way to go.

My favorite part of John's passage says, "In this is love, not that we have loved God but that He loved us..." My love for God, or for anyone else, proves nothing. It is simply a response to His love. His love for me, and everyone else, is limitless, all-consuming, awe-inspiring, but it is independent of my love.

His love is there even if mine isn't. That is ____. I can't find a word. That's what unconditional means. He doesn't need to be motivated or obligated to love me based on my actions or righteousness, or the way I treat Him. His love doesn't depend on me loving Him at all. That's how I want to love, with a love that doesn't require.

If we love, we know God. If we know God, we love. If we don't love, we don't know God. If we don't know God, we don't love. Any questions?

I hope you all have a Happy Valentine's Day in spite of me. If anyone will let me buy them some chocolate, say the word.

A pretty pic and canned biscuits

First, as promised -- a picture post. That really is an awesome pic of those two.

And second, ya wanna know what scares the pee out of me? Canned biscuits.

I fix canned biscuits because it's kinda hard and senseless to make 'em homemade for just one. A batch of four doesn't cut it.

The other night I had, for lack of a better word, a hankering for biscuits. I shuddered immediately at the thought of having to open the little buggers. I hate those cans. It's an evil, wicked person who came up with those stinking, jack-in-the-box cans.

The label says to "peel wrapper in the direction of the arrow until can pops." Pops my rear-end!! It's a thunderous explosion. I always start peeling really slow, with one eye half-opened, waiting for the inevitable but unpredictable blast. I can never guess when it's going to happen. I hold my breath, turn my head, and just when I think it's coming, nothing. So I exhale and then,

BOOOOMMMM!!!

It gets me every time. I stand there waiting for the concussive wave that will blow me off my feet and across the kitchen. But what's worse is when the can doesn't open. Even after the whole label is off, the can remains a ticking time bomb. I beat it on the counter, nothing. I drop it on the floor, nothing. I kick it with my toe, nothing. So I get a knife out of the drawer, gently poke around the seam and wait for the blast wave that will propel the knife deep into my eyeball.

Strangely, this reminds me of habitual sins. Those ones that repeatedly trip us up. We all have them, don't deny it. They may seem small and insignificant, they might not even bother us most of the time, but they are there. And they remain an obstacle between us and the relationship with God that He intends for us to have.

Like canned biscuits, we hold them in our hands, hoping they don't hurt us, but knowing that at any moment they could blow up in our faces, always wondering if this will be the moment when our sin explodes and causes harm to us or our loved ones. We slowly peel away at it, exposing more of it, waiting for the inevitable pop.

Sin and canned biscuits. For Pete's sake, someone could get hurt!!!

# 100

This is my 100th post!!! I think I'll bake a cake.

I've been thinking, what if we aren't the first JGen?

I know you've heard someone say, "Jesus hung out with lepers, prostitutes and thieves." People usually use this phrase to justify running around with a crowd they shouldn't be hanging with. I probably used it myself "back in the day." We tell ourselves we are trying to influence them, that we are "the light in the darkness." Blah, blah, blah and yaddah, yaddah.

Everytime I hear it I cringe. Because it's just not true and it's certainly not biblical. In preparing for Friday night's Jesus study, I've really been looking at His lifestyle, how He traveled and what He did as a man. He came to earth to reach people, but the Bible tells us to be careful who we associate with. Jesus isn't going to do something that contradicts His instructions to us.

Jesus went to the lost. He crossed paths with them everywhere He went, that's why He went there. But He came to them for purpose. He taught them, healed them and testified to them of Himself. He came to each of us that way, or we would still be lost.

But what about His family? His crew, His boys, His posse, the gang, His bro's, or His "small group?" They are called The Twelve. Kind of ominous sounding, ain't it?

These are the ones Jesus rolled with. He ate with them, traveled with them, called them to follow Him, and commissioned them to carry on after He was gone. These are the ones He prayed with, the ones who saw Him in Gethsemane broken and afraid because of what was to come. He asked them to get His back when He was at His most human. These men, and the other disciples and followers, including women, were His church family. They were the ones who loved Him the most, were willing to follow Him anywhere, even to death. And these are the ones who asked the most of Him, tried His patience, bickered and argued about Him, and sought His favor and blessing.

Whatever it looked like, it's a picture-perfect example of how He wants His church to be, of how He wants us to be. It was family, bound by love and unified in purpose.

Maybe they met on Fridays and had dinner. Maybe they came up with silly skits to do in the temple (Mary and Martha performing "Baklava is the New Deodorant"). Maybe they scroll-blogged during the week (I picture Andrew dressed in a "Blogger.com" toga running all around Judea delivering scrolls) and sent encouraging messages to the young disciples who were away at school and couldn't be there. Maybe Thomas played "Captain Underpants" for everyone's entertainment. Maybe someone wrote a devotion called "Life is Like Un-leavened Bread." I wonder if Jesus planned a Disciple Now and they all looked at each other and said, "Dude, what's a disciple?"

Just like them, we are to be set apart. They were recognized as His own. They eventually came to realize what a privilege it is to be called "His."

Jesus had a JGen of His own. How cool is that?!? I wonder if He called it MyGen?

Happy Friday, everyone.

I've been thinking...

about the parts of God we choose to ignore because they don't jibe with what we want. I mean, we all focus on God's love and His blessings, His grace, mercy, compassion, and His patience with us. And praise to Him for all those attributes, don't get me wrong. Without them, I would be dead, literally and spiritually. But what about our part of the bargain?

I think about the choices we make. We come to crossroads all the time. Some big and some small. There is a right way, which is His way, and there's a wrong way which would be following ourselves. I shamefully confess that I choose me most of the time. But that's what I want to change, to truly die to myself.

God approaches us all the time. He gives us little nudges, little whispers, even strong warnings to alert us to Him and the changes we need to make. All with the purpose of drawing us closer to Him and leading us further down the path that He wants us to go. Events like Disciple Now are usually an opportune time for this, I think, because we are always so open to hearing Him. But how often do we hear God but reason out ways to follow our desires? We ask Him to speak to us, then don't listen to what He says.

Benji got me thinking about this tonight when he talked about accountability. We talk alot about loving each other, but is it real or merely selective? Is it only a love of convenience, there as long as we don't contradict each other?

I can't say for sure how I would react to someone approaching me and telling me I need to make a change. I like to think I would respectfully listen then prayerfully consider their words and walk away loving them the same, or even more for loving me enough to get involved. That's really what Jesus had in mind for His bride. That is true accountability. But would I, could I do that? Could you?

To bring this all around to point, ponder this:

Then the Lord made for them a statute and a rule, and there He tested them, saying, "If you will diligently listen to the voice of the Lord your God, and do that which is right in His eyes, and give ear to His commandments and keep all His statutes, I will put none of the diseases on you that I put on the Egyptians, for I am the Lord, your Healer." --Exodus 15:25, 26

Obedience brings blessings. Obedience also brings averted judgments. Faithfulness to the word of God is the means by which we continue to receive the benefits of the relationship with God. It would be nice to receive favor for nothing, just as Christ died for us while we were sinners. But in order to grow, in order to learn Him and fulfill His plan, we must hear, listen, and be obedient. That's why He sent His Spirit to guide us.

How many blessings have I missed by listening to me? How many nudges and warnings have I ignored, blown off because they didn't fit with my plan? Because I wouldn't let God wreck my life?

How many times have I chosen to not approach someone because I didn't trust in their love for me? And how many people don't trust in my love for them enough to approach me? If we're not loving like that, we are just noisy cymbals. (see 1 Corinthians 13)

It seems poor, old Jonah keeps showing up. God spoke and he listened...to himself. He ignored God's voice because he didn't love. His judgment was not averted.

While we focus on the attributes of God that we like, let's not forget to love Him in return. We do that by following His word and His ways. And blessings will follow.

And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you, if you obey the voice of the Lord your God. --Deuteronomy 28:2

Job, Snow, and R.O.U.S's

Every time it snows I think about Job. Not getting the connection? Allow me to explain.

Job is one of my favorite books in the Bible. I feel a kind of kinship with him. Not that I've faced anything close to the hardships he suffered, but his story is a real eye-opener to God's glory and majesty, as well as His power and love. You should read it. Right now, even.

The book of Job contains some of the most wonderful descriptions of God in the whole Bible. Here's the one that I think of when it snows:

Keep listening to the thunder of His voice
And the rumbling that comes from His mouth.
Under the whole heaven He lets it go,
And His lightning to the corners of the earth.
After it His voice roars; He thunders with His majestic voice,
And He does not restrain the lightnings when His voice is heard.
God thunders wondrously with His voice;
He does great things that we cannot comprehend.
For to the snow He says, "Fall on the earth,"
Likewise to the downpour, His mighty downpour. -Job 37:2-6

I have a different perspective on the snow than most of you. While you sit in your cozy, warm offices and living rooms and watch the snow fall and pile up on tree limbs and rooftops, I'm all bundled up, watching it spot up my safety glasses, melt through my coat, and wiping snot off my nose with a cold, wet glove. And I LOVE it. There is one thing about a snowfall that really does it for me...the silence.

Snow has a way of dampening sound. First of all, the traffic is much lighter so there is less car noise. But everything is just quieter. Voices don't carry as far, objects hit the ground with a dull thud, and footsteps are almost undetectable.

Today I was working on a pole during the heaviest snowfall of the day. I could barely see the phone cable in front of me. The wind was blowing, and stinging, and my fingertips were numb, but not numb enough to kill the pain. But it was completely silent. All I could hear was my own breathing, and sometimes singing, and the faint sound of the truck running thirty feet below me. It was just me and all I could think of was this passage from Job.

Job isn't the one speaking here. It's his "friend" Elihu who has come to console Job in his misfortune. It's more of a brow-beating than a consolation but here he is just proclaiming the majesty of God. He asks Job to consider God's majesty in relation to the complaint Job has with God. In the next chapter, God answers Job by questioning if he can explain creation and it's wonders. That pretty much shuts up Job and his complaining.

Of course, God shows His love by restoring Job and everything he lost. But our gracious God doubles everything Job lost, including the years of his life. How blessed we are to be loved by such a love.

So, I guess that's my point. Even a simple snowfall can lead one to regard God's love. Creation itself is an expression of His love.

When I got home late last night, The Princess Bride was on television. The perfect ending to the day.

Have fun storming the castle!

Here's a good message

I know most of the time we take a write-'em-off attitude toward the older preachers. That's not always a smart thing, as is evident in this sermon by Charles Stanley. This particular sermon really sums up the problem we have with giving it all to God or, as we like to say, dying to self. Our desires and our desire to control our desires kinda gets in the way of that.



If you don't have time to watch the video, go here for the outline.

Dr. Stanley is pastor of First Baptist Church of Atlanta. I've heard very few preachers who preach straight-up truth like he does. His sermons are as biblical as you will find anywhere.

It must be the medication

Last night I commented to someone that I thought I was getting sick. Well, aren't I just the little prophet? My head feels like it's filled with a cookies-and-cream milkshake. And I'm coughing something with a similar consistency. So I'm taking some sort of Ny-Quil, Sudafed, Robitussin, Tylenol macchiato latte concoction. If my thoughts for the day seem random, now you know why.

1) I love hanging around with college people. They are always spouting what Professor So-and-So said about such-and-such. With all the new things filling their minds, they can't help but let it overflow. I didn't attend college, just a year of tech school and it's my greatest regret. I would've done well in college because I love to read and I love to learn. It's almost like a passion. I yearn to learn (ha!). So when I read blogs or have conversations with folks like Spanky, Sarah, Virginia and others, I can't help but soak it up. It's like I get a do-over.

2) I heard one of those hardcore T.V. preachers tonight and they actually made a very good point. In between all the sweating and "ah-huh's", he mentioned that we sometimes treat the church building like the Old Testament temple. He said since our bodies are now the temple of God, we should think of them the way we do our sanctuaries. There are numerous things we wouldn't dare think of doing at church. But if we are the real temple we are supposed to be, those things we wouldn't do at church, we shouldn't do in our hearts and minds. I just thought that was a fresh perspective.

3) I was making one of my favorite dishes for supper, garlic and broccoli rotini. While the pasta was boiling, I laid down on the couch to let my head recover and I dozed off. I burned pasta. Rotini shouldn't be black, I think. That really ruined my day. So I settled for a potted meat sandwich. Yummy still, but not the same.

4) When Balaam's donkey talked to him, he talked back without hesitation. Do you think he wondered what the crap was going on? HIS DONKEY TALKED TO HIM!!! When I read the story, I always have visions of Shrek.

5) The funniest thing I heard today: "This stimulus package, which I hope fails, had better work." --Stephen Colbert

6) For anyone who is interested, Dinner and Danger will be Saturday at 5:00 p.m. in the youth center. Heather will be reprising her role as Bess Page, I will play the role of Frankie Falvo, a two-bit gangster thug, and I'm not sure if any other JGenners are in this one. Come if you can and support Jeff and his on-going ministry.

7) Finally, the Bible verse that really stuck with me today.

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weaknesses. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit Himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And He who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. --Romans 8:26, 27

We talked last Friday about the anointing of the Spirit upon salvation. I rejoice in knowing that I have an Intercessor to carry the longings of my heart to God, even when my feeble, human mind can't form the words to express them.

I guess that's all for tonight. I apologize for the incoherency. Everyone have a great day.

Have it your way

At church tonight, Benji talked about Balaam and his talking donkey (you should be proud of me for restraining myself and not going KJV). One of the many things I love about God is how a simple message from His word can actually turn into a knock-your-socks-off sermon.

The point from the sermon that really got me was when Benji talked about God sometimes letting us "win" the argument. Balaam was told by God to not speak evil of His people. Balak didn't like that and kept pressuring Balaam to do so. Easily-influenced Balaam kinda waffled when the princes hassled him about it and God finally said, "Have at it." (I paraphrased)

Then God got angry when he followed. The stubborn old donkey was Balaam's salvation by keeping the angel from killing him and Balaam finally saw the angel and got the meesage. This isn't a very good telling of the story so go to Numbers 22 for the missing details.

Here's the kicker: God let Balaam go with the crowd. I think I can say with all certainty that God sometimes lets us follow our own lead and pursue our desires. Even those He has told us we don't need. In our selfishness and self-righteousness we come to think we know what we need and what is right. So God says, "Fine. Have it your way." We step out of His will and into our own and this usually lasts long enough for us to come near to our own destruction. But I love how Benji described God's Word. "The Bible is the donkey. It will lead you down the right path. You can beat it and scream at it but it knows the safe way and the way that will keep you in God."

In His limitless love, God reaches out and brings us back to Him. He lets us learn our lesson, sometimes the hard way, but He is always there to receive us back, ashamed and broken, into His arms.

Like Balaam, we usually have the perspective of never having seen the danger until it was right in front of us. What seemed right and good and fun turns out to be the sword of Damocles.

This story made me think of how God liked to use animals as vessels of salvation. Balaam had a donkey. Jonah had a fish. Elijah had the birds. Good thing those critters are around, huh?

I just laughed out loud thinking of Brad Stine's bit about Adam naming the animals. At first, Adam gave them all beautiful and glorious names like hippopotamus and giraffe. But by the time he got down to the end, he was over it and just called them what they did. Fly. Ha!

Have a good day, y'all.

The best laid plans...

I had planned to post tonight on deep, spiritual mysteries that would illuminate the souls of all who read. But, didn't happen. I got caught up in reading and now it's almost midnight. So this is all you get.

Uno- I like what Heather and Sarah posted today because I'm kinda there, too. Not downcast or heavy-burdened but just a little foggy. Sarah's right, though. After Disciple Now, you'd think we would all be walking in paradise. But great spiritual awakenings and revivals aren't one-time deals. They are movements and processes. I believe God has hardly begun his work in us and around us. He's going to do things that we can't imagine. If you're like me, you want to see it all happen in one night or one weekend and then sit back and savor it. Don't be like me. Look forward to what's coming next.

Deux- Living in a way that shows Christ to others doesn't always mean that they will respect you or get the point. Today at work, I had a run-in with a guy who didn't particularly care for the design of the job I was working on. He thought it should be done differently. I call it a run-in because what else would you call it when someone threatens to wrap a steel pipe around your head? I'm not sure this was exactly Christ-like but all I could think to say was, "Go ahead. But your just gonna have to buy a new pipe." He walked away looking rather forlorn and malcontent.

Tri-(angle?)- Just something that encouraged me today.


And they heard the sound of the Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden. But the Lord God called to the man and said to him, "Where are you?" --Genesis 3:8, 9

It just made me feel good knowing that when I sin and try to ignore God because I'm ashamed, He comes looking for me. He knows that I have placed an obstacle between us and He wants it removed. So He comes to find me and restore our relationship. That may come with consequences and sometimes discipline, but would we want it to be otherwise? Would we want the one in whom we have placed our future and eternal hope to be flippant about our relationship with Him? I wouldn't.

Anyway, I hope everyone has a great day.

How to be a man

So today was Baptist Men's day and the sermon from the pulpit was geared that direction. It was a fine sermon overall, but I couldn't help but notice that something was lacking. I'm no preacher so don't take this as a critique of Dr. Golden's abilities. He definitely brings the truth. But today he was talking about how to "cowboy up" which is supposed to be cool guy talk for "be a man." He's from Texas so I'll throw him a bone on that one. I couldn't keep from thinking about one of my favorite verses:

When David's time to die drew near, he commanded Solomon his son, saying, "I am about to go the way of all the earth. Be strong, and show yourself a man." --1 Kings 2:1,2

King David knew a little something about being a man. And not just because he slew lions and giants. He struggled with the things common to all men. He made tough decisions that got people killed. But he was also tender enough to write a ballad of love or a psalm of appreciation to his God. David was a man because, no matter how many battlefield victories he had, no matter how many wrongs he committed, no matter how the nation of Israel prospered or floundered under his reign, David knew that victory, peace, joy, and success were found in the hands of the Lord. And God Himself testified to this by referring to King David as "a man after my heart, who will do all my will." --Acts 13:22

The dying King charged his son with a command to be a man. He then goes on to tell Solomon how to do this. This is King David's own definition of how to be a man:

"...and keep the charge of the Lord your God, walking in His ways and keeping His statutes, His commandments, His rules, and His testimonies, as it is written in the Law of Moses, that you may prosper in all that you do and wherever you turn." --1 Kings 2:3

Being a man may mean fighting for truth. It may mean defending your family or the sheep. But more often than not, the way to be a man is to kneel. Fight on your knees with God's word hidden in your heart. Here are a few examples from the Bible of men who showed their strength and masculinity by yielding to God and letting Him win the victories:

Abraham
Joseph
Moses
Joshua
Samson
Gideon
Samuel
Hezekiah
and on and on and on and on.

The list is un-ending. One of my favorite examples is Peter. Peter was hot-headed, know-it-all, and ready for a fight. I think of him as sort of the crony/henchman type. He was quick to promise and slow to deliver when it counted. But Peter became a church founder and one of the greatest preachers in history. But only when he traded in his own strength and manhood for that found in service to his Master did Peter's heart change from that of a fighter to that of a lover. Peter came to realize that strength is found in humility.

Of course, the ultimate example of anything, especially a man, is found in Jesus Christ Himself. With all power at His disposal, Jesus chose humility and shame. He chose to not fight, but rather to be beaten, abused, ridiculed, and killed. Jesus even said that He could save Himself if He so wished. But He chose to sacrifice Himself for us. He put others, all others, before Himself.

Most Christian men are willing to humble themselves to a point; the preservation of their pride being that point. But Jesus humbled Himself to the point of death. That, to me, says that love is the greatest proof of strength. We don't need to get in tune with our inner hunter/gatherer, we don't need to find in ourselves the wild heart of God, and we don't need three-day, animal skin-wearing, bathing optional retreats. We simply need to lead in surrender to the Almighty One, the real Man.

Back on track

I started this blog because I needed a place to preach. I needed a pulpit and an audience because God has given me a message to speak. I think I have drifted away from that purpose by trying to opine with the crowd. So, read it or don't. Agree with it or don't. The choice is yours. My choice is to follow the call.

And He said to all, "If anyone would come after Me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow Me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my a sake will save it." --Luke 9:23, 24

First of all, let me say that this is the call of JGen. To deny one's self and follow Christ daily. Continual, moment-by-moment denial and rejection of the world, and our desires to be accepted by it. This is discipleship at its purest and most earnest.

Jesus' disciples knew that to "come after Him" meant to join company with Him and His posse as they walked about ministering in Palestine. As was said this weekend, and by Benji for the past fifty or so years, true salvation isn't just believing, it's following.

We can't follow half-heartedly. It's an all or none deal. Jesus didn't take His cross part of the way. He didn't take on half of the world's sins. He didn't die for half of mankind. It was for all. Or for none at all.

How many times I have made a commitment to turn my life completely over to God, only to find myself unchanged a few short weeks later. It's because I only went half-way. I released a few things to Him; the obvious things that everyone knew about me. This makes for a good show of obedience and gets some hearty amens from the old-timers. But those things that I held onto were anchors.

I can't take up my cross if my hands are full of my desires and treasures. They must be laid down and left behind me. Jesus took His cross and carried it to the point of His death. If we wish to follow Him, we must be willing to do the same. It's a decision that will lead to rejection, isolation, suffering, and even death. But as is written Hebrews 12:2: "...who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame."

Jesus suffered the shame of a public, naked execution, and the pain of torturous death for the future reward and joy that was promised. Most likely, our suffering will be much less than His. But our reward will be the same. I don't know about you, but that sounds like love to me.

Daily self-denial and contempt for the world is the path of Christ. It's the path to righteousness and to eternal joy.

What are the treasures in your hands? A home? A job? Wealth? A relationship?

You have a mansion in heaven. You have a purpose in Christ. You have eternal riches. And you have a love that cannot fade away.

Re-cap

It's hard to know where to begin talking about Disciple Now weekend. So much has happened in three days that it may take multiple posts to cover it all.

The students were awesome. My group of middle school boys were everything I thought they would be, from sweating and stinking to beating the crap out of each other with boxing gloves. Literally. We had two black eyes, three cut foreheads and a busted lip. And they loved it. They never once got mad at each other, they just kept on playing.

As you can see from the pictures on the right, nine boys have about the same power as a category 4 hurricane. And the same respect. Everything was fair game at Benji's house and, amazingly, there was no property loss.

I want to say thanks to all the leaders for doing a great job. I love and admire each of you and count it a blessing to serve with you. Knowing your hearts for our church and the student group is a source of strength and joy for me. You are truly the spirit of JGen.

I believe something wonderful happened this weekend. I prayed for D-Now for over two weeks that God would do something life-changing in someone's heart. That He would show Himself to someone and lead them closer to Him and His desires. I believe that miracle happened. I can't wait for the coming days as we hear testimonies about the ways God moved in people's hearts and lives.

For me, D-Now showed me alot. The most important of these being that God has me where He wants me. But He wants me to give more to it. He is doing marvelous things at SCBC and I praise Him for letting me be involved. But He also demands more from me. I need a more biblical way of living so that He can be seen.

Speaking of seeing God, at the New Year's service Benji challenged us to ponder what we wanted this year. I was immediately drawn to Job 42:5 which says,

I had heard of you by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees You.

I believe I have seen God in 2008 in ways I never imagined. He has revealed Himself to me on a personal level and literally touched my heart. But I'm not satisfied. I want to focus this year on seeing Him more. "May the vision of You be the death of me" was a line in a worship song this weekend and it made me crumble. I've never felt so singled out. That has been my prayer for months and this weekend God let me know that we all will be seeing more of Him. Our Jacob curriculum spoke to me in Genesis 32:30:

For I have seen God face to face, and yet my life has been delivered.

Jacob had to deal with consequences of his actions and the actions of others. But he came to see God as his own. He came full circle with Esau. And he came to the death of himself for God's purposes and glory.

I confess here and now that I pray for my death. The death of my ways, my desires and my glory to Him so that I can be delivered. So that He can be glorified in His ways and His desires.

I pray for the heart that God touched this weekend. I pray for the one that made the tough decision to make changes for Him. I pray they know they are not alone. That God is calling all of us to do the same.

Disciple Now Kickoff...

...was a blast! We had about 45 there and ten or so more to come Friday. This is gonna be big.

We started off with cardboard testimonies and it was really cool to see all those kids sit still and be speechless. You could tell they were getting it but in true young person style, they were not sure if they wanted to acknowledge they were getting it.

Next we met our "families" for the weekend. Benji and I have the middle-school boys group. They really are great, despite the stereotypes. Although most of the stereotypes are true. The best part was coming up with a nickname for everybody. Here's a rundown because it's too funny to pass it by. First, the Breakfast Club:

Tanner Kerlin is "Bacon".
Austin Grindstaff is "Gravy".
Tyler Walker is "Sausage".
Josh Coleman is, appropriately, "Ham".
Anthony (Miller?) is "Cheerios".
Bennett Fowler is "Grease".
And my favorite, Dylan Blume is "Tenderloin".

Hunter Payne is "Head" because he has an enormous head for his size.
Landon Raby is "Sasquatch" because he wears about a size 23 1\2 shoe.
Benji is "Mullet" because I told the guys about his high school hair style.
He, in turn, named me "Stache" because of the Tom Selleck mustache I had from eighth grade through graduation. I was actually just trying to be like Doug McNeil (Vanessa, please pass that along :).

Finally, we performed our skit. It worked out extremely well and I think the kids began to see how temptations come subtly but effectively. I'm looking forward to prompting them to talk about the skit (skeet). Thanks to Hannah for doing the t-shirts and Virginia "Mean Train" Rule for being the bouncer at the door. I played "cruelty", fittingly, and Cody begged me to slap him which I obliged fervently. Heather did a great job being the idea person and I can't wait to perform Part Deux on Sunday.

As you can see, it's going to be a wild weekend. We're going to have insane amounts of fun. But honestly, the thing I'm looking forward to the most is just being around my family. That, to me, is fun. The joy that comes from hanging out with these youth, the college kids, Benji, Heather, Ryan and Juli, Rachel, Don and all the others involved is immeasurable. Virginia said it right, it is safe. It's strength also.

God is moving. He has something great in store for us. He has already done some marvelous things in the preparation for this weekend. Keep Disciple-Now in your prayers. Keep SCBC Students in them, too.

Sarah and Spanky --hurry up and get back in town. I missed you two tonight.

Day of Prayer

Today has been filled with prayer. I can't remember when I've felt so close to God. Thanks to Virginia for suggesting the day of fasting and to Don for suggesting the prayer meeting tonight.

I've never had much luck with fasting. I'm an eater. Big-time. I'm a three squares kinda guy, with a few extras thrown in. But today, God gave me a hand. I'm not kidding. On Sunday when fasting was called for, I thought to myself, "Yeah, okay. I'll play along. But by 10:00 a.m. I'll be willing to sell my third kidney for a Twinkie."

That's not what happened. From the time I woke up this morning, I haven't really even thought about eating. I've been thinking about God. I've been thinking about D-Now, the leaders, the students, Jacob, Jonah, and Jesus. I've been thinking about JGen and post D-Now. I've been thinking about the people I'm concerned about, the heavy hearts, the ones walking the tightrope, and the kids I hope will show up this weekend. There are some that I call "special needs" in a spiritual sense.

So thanks to God for showing Himself to me today in a different way.

As long as we're expressing our prayers:

Father, thank You for a wonderful day. Thank You for Your closeness and for helping me through something I usually fail at. Come near to us this weekend as we seek Your face. I pray the students' hearts will be opened to You. Many of them are hurting, many are searching, and some of them don't know how badly they need You. Show Yourself to them in a real and undeniable way. I pray that, even if they forget about Jonah or Jacob, they will come away with a desire to know You more, to seek after You, to surrender to You. I pray they will be willing to sacrifice in order to draw near to You.

Lord, work in the hearts of the leaders. Conform us, break us if you must, so that we can truly lead and not just teach. Help us to lead the kids by example in obedience and surrender to You. May they look at our lives and simply see You and Your love for them. Bring us together as one family with one purpose in mind --to bring glory to You. Amen.

So here we go. Cardboard testimonies, skits, games, lock-ins, and all. Disciple-Now is upon us and not a moment too soon. The anticipation is becoming unbearable.

And proof that God is real? I went all day without a Mountain Dew, or even a fudge round. Gimme an amen, Spenser.